Friday, December 25, 2009
Scrooge-Grinch 2009
There are several reasons why I have no Xmas spirit this year; not that I ever had enough holiday gusto anyway. Firstly, I have been afflicted by a chronic cold and cough since November. I have dragged myself to work and social functions even when I had a recurring fever and sore throat. I finally sought medical intervention yesterday because I was afraid my broncho-pneumonia had returned with a vengeance. I was diagnosed with acute pharyngitis with a complication of my asthma. Our holidays won't be the same either, with the recent loss of our beloved Hannahgirl. We had wanted to bring her to the annual Pride March and had her red costume ready. But she was so unwell then that we decided not to take her after a visit with the vet. Right after the parade, we rushed home to take her for emergency treatment. She was diagnosed with a bleeding ulcer and a severe cold. 2 days on IV and her tummy was so distended, the vet conducted another lab test. It was discovered that there was a problem with her female reproductive organs and immediate surgery was required. It cost us a lot, but Jeni wouldn't have it any other way. Hannah survived the surgery but her infection had spread, and she died last December 9th.In the light of the global economic crisis, everyone had problems with finances. Although, my employment was sufficiently protected by the fact that I was in government service, my salary still suffered the impact nevertheless. Holiday blessings also seemed to come on the short end. It didnt help that I missed out on the raffle draw because I had to finish a rush job for the OSEC..(F,,,ck..ng golf and country clubs!) As a result, I left the office party early in disgust and frustration.Jeni refuses to fall into a holiday depression though. She cheerfully trekked to Quiapo to shop for cheap Xmas gifts. With our limited resources, she decided to engage in a little commercial enterprising and sold Xmas brownies and designer chocolates. She managed to coerce me into becoming her marketing arm and I had to squeeze in selling duties in between my office work and social engagements.I am grateful for the Xmas gifts I've received though. My officemates have remained generous despite being similarly cash-strapped as I am. I was surprised that business entities I have dealt with during the year have also remembered me this holiday season. But in my present health condition, I had to skip on the usual XMas parties. I hope I somehow "pick up emotionally" before Xmas...otherwise, I'd surely miss out on all the fun and excitement.
My Hannah
I just lost a very dear friend last week. We were together for 11 years and she helped me through a lot of ups and downs. She came into my life in 1999 just when I was dealing with the loss of another loved one, Spencer. He left in the prime of his youth, quite abruptly, and it was hard to get over. That's when Hannah entered our lives and we immediately fell in love with her. She was the last to be sold; probably the runt of the litter. She had a widow's peak on her rust-brown head and the most soulful eyes. And Angie and I ended up paying more than what she would have actually sold for. When Angie and I broke up, Hannah got to go with me while Flygirl stayed with Anj. That was another heartbreak she had to pull me out of. Living with my family in Kamias again, she slept in the room wherever I was. When I got my own room, she slept by the foot of my bed too. Hannah knew the land of tears very well. She instinctively knew when one was crying. She would rise up on her short hind legs, reach for your face and lick off your tears. Hannah was a quiet dog. A real house-pet who stayed out of your way most of the time. She never pressured you to play with her after a tough day at work, and would patiently wait to be fed. She loved her walks though and her favorite word was "walk". Say it out loud and she would immediately lunge for the door, happily jumping up and down. She was an English-speaking dog too, and responded to such instructions as "stay" and "behave". She can even understand "eat your vegetables" and obediently went back to her potatoes one time to the utter shock and amazement of my sister.Speaking of my sister, one time I asked her to babysit Hannah at her home and her stupid maids left the gates open so Hannah got out. Here's something Hannah and I had in common, we're both poor in navigation. For a hounddog like her, she gets lost and confused very easily and she wouldn't know how to get back home. I cried like hell at the thought of losing her..until tricycle drivers near Claret School took pity on us and pointed to a corner store where a brown dog was last seen. The store-owners were full of bad faith since they initially denied having Hannah, and deliberately tried to confuse our maid. They eventually let Hannah out of the bathroom where they were hiding her, but these people clearly wanted to dognap her. Hannah hated baths, but nevertheless endured the cold water and stood still until the whole dousing was all over for her. Even with her short fur, she stank up quite easily, so baths became a regular torture chamber for her. Another thing she hated were car rides. She gets car-sick you see, even for very short distances. We had to give her Bonamine for the travel from QC to Malate last year for the 2008 Pride March. This is something she and Jeni had in common..motion-sickness. There was another preference she shared with Jeni, her new mama - she absolutely loved chicken and daing na bangus. Hijo mio aka "destructo" and I loved our meat, on the other hand. She didnt care for dogfood much, and had a penchant for tablescraps. She never begged from the dinner table though, and was trained enough to wait for her own share.She was actually housetrained and had a routine - she needed to be let out every morning for her weewee and poopoo. At Tandang Sora, newspapers were readily available to her even with evening walks. At Kamias, she would asked to be let out to the garage. She clearly communicated this requirement to people by looking at you and heading for the door. if you were too stupid, she'd bark at you so you'd get it. But that was the limited barking you'd get from her. She rarely barked or howled but when she did, it was quite a racket. When she moved to Sta. Mesa with me, she hated being left alone the whole day. She scratched the door and spooked the neighbors with her howling. Fortunately, it wasn't long before Hijo Mio came to live with us too. For a while, she didn't mind the 3 floors of stairs to go walking. But I noticed that those regular walks took its toll on both of us, so we eventually stopped. Her exercise became limited to going up and down the stairs in our small apartment and running away from super-frenetic "destructo". So it was to her last days, she would greet us at the door when we get home from work, wait to be fed after we've eaten, quietly lie on her mat in her favorite corner while we watch DVD; even head up to the bedroom with us as soon as it was sleeping time."Be a good girl" translates to goodbyes to Hannah since that is what we always tell her when we leave to go to work everyday. I hope she is being good wherever she is now..
Holy See's Statement in NY
Repost from Sass of STRAP
After our panel discussion on 10 December 2009 , the Holy See read this comment:
Mr. Moderator,
Thank you for convening this panel discussion and for providing the opportunity to hear some very serious concerns raised this afternoon. My comments are more in the form of a statement rather than a question.
As stated during the debate of the General Assembly last year, the Holy See continues to oppose all grave violations of human rights against homosexual persons, such as the use of the death penalty, torture and other cruel, inhuman and degrading punishment. The Holy See also opposes all forms of violence and unjust discrimination against homosexual persons, including discriminatory penal legislation which undermines the inherent dignity of the human person.
As raised by some of the panelists today, the murder and abuse of homosexual persons are to be confronted on all levels, especially when such violence is perpetrated by the State. While the Holy See’s position on the concepts of sexual orientation and gender identity remains well known, we continue to call on all States and individuals to respect the rights of all persons and to work to promote their inherent dignity and worth.
Thank you, Mr. Moderator.
ECOSOC Chamber, 10 December 2009, UN Headquarters, New York
After our panel discussion on 10 December 2009 , the Holy See read this comment:
Mr. Moderator,
Thank you for convening this panel discussion and for providing the opportunity to hear some very serious concerns raised this afternoon. My comments are more in the form of a statement rather than a question.
As stated during the debate of the General Assembly last year, the Holy See continues to oppose all grave violations of human rights against homosexual persons, such as the use of the death penalty, torture and other cruel, inhuman and degrading punishment. The Holy See also opposes all forms of violence and unjust discrimination against homosexual persons, including discriminatory penal legislation which undermines the inherent dignity of the human person.
As raised by some of the panelists today, the murder and abuse of homosexual persons are to be confronted on all levels, especially when such violence is perpetrated by the State. While the Holy See’s position on the concepts of sexual orientation and gender identity remains well known, we continue to call on all States and individuals to respect the rights of all persons and to work to promote their inherent dignity and worth.
Thank you, Mr. Moderator.
ECOSOC Chamber, 10 December 2009, UN Headquarters, New York
After Comelec, Congress vs LGBTs
Solon seeks to criminalize same-sex unionBy GABRIEL S. MABUTASDecember 8, 2009, 6:24pm
A lawmaker called Tuesday for the enactment of a law that would criminalize same-sex union in the country, saying the absence of such measure might just invite same-sex couples to explore the possibility of getting married.
Manila Rep. Bienvenido Abante, Jr. sought to penalize such marriage through House Bill 6919.
In making his proposal, Abante said such marriage should be discouraged by a criminalizing measure because it is “highly immoral, scandalous and detestable act.”
He said if such a union “becomes a reality in this part of the globe, that would snap the remaining strand of our moral values.”
Abante, chairman of the House committee on public information, said there is no specific provision in the Revised Penal Code penalizing a person for marrying another of the same gender, neither is there a provision penalizing a person for solemnizing the marriage of persons of the same gender.
“While there is no documented same-sex marriage yet in our country, the absence of clear legislation serves as an invitation to same-sex marriage,” Abante said.
Under the bill, violators faces 15 years of imprisonment and a fine of not more than P150,000.
The bill provides that anybody who misdeclares or hides his or her true sex or gender for the purpose of securing a marriage license faces a 12-year jail term and a fine of P100,000.
Likewise, the bill also seeks to punish any person who shall issue a marriage license, or who shall solemnize the marriage of persons of the same sex or gender with imprisonment of 10 years and a fine of not more than P100,000.
Under the bill, if the offender is a public officer, he or she shall be dismissed from employment and be barred from subsequent employment in any government office.
If the offender is authorized to solemnize marriage, his or her license or authority to solemnize marriage shall be revoked without need of further proceedings and shall be perpetually barred from solemnizing marriage.
It shall be the duty of the Local Civil Registrar and the solemnizing officer to first ascertain the true sex or gender of the parties before issuing a marriage license and solemnizing a marriage.
“Any marriage license issued, and any marriage solemnized, in violation of this measure shall be declared null and void,” Abante said.
A lawmaker called Tuesday for the enactment of a law that would criminalize same-sex union in the country, saying the absence of such measure might just invite same-sex couples to explore the possibility of getting married.
Manila Rep. Bienvenido Abante, Jr. sought to penalize such marriage through House Bill 6919.
In making his proposal, Abante said such marriage should be discouraged by a criminalizing measure because it is “highly immoral, scandalous and detestable act.”
He said if such a union “becomes a reality in this part of the globe, that would snap the remaining strand of our moral values.”
Abante, chairman of the House committee on public information, said there is no specific provision in the Revised Penal Code penalizing a person for marrying another of the same gender, neither is there a provision penalizing a person for solemnizing the marriage of persons of the same gender.
“While there is no documented same-sex marriage yet in our country, the absence of clear legislation serves as an invitation to same-sex marriage,” Abante said.
Under the bill, violators faces 15 years of imprisonment and a fine of not more than P150,000.
The bill provides that anybody who misdeclares or hides his or her true sex or gender for the purpose of securing a marriage license faces a 12-year jail term and a fine of P100,000.
Likewise, the bill also seeks to punish any person who shall issue a marriage license, or who shall solemnize the marriage of persons of the same sex or gender with imprisonment of 10 years and a fine of not more than P100,000.
Under the bill, if the offender is a public officer, he or she shall be dismissed from employment and be barred from subsequent employment in any government office.
If the offender is authorized to solemnize marriage, his or her license or authority to solemnize marriage shall be revoked without need of further proceedings and shall be perpetually barred from solemnizing marriage.
It shall be the duty of the Local Civil Registrar and the solemnizing officer to first ascertain the true sex or gender of the parties before issuing a marriage license and solemnizing a marriage.
“Any marriage license issued, and any marriage solemnized, in violation of this measure shall be declared null and void,” Abante said.
Murphy's Law
It was a Thursday when I first got the news. I was in far away Tacloban and I bribed a kid at the field office to let me use the internet. The poor guy had to wait for me to finish till after office hours. I was so incensed by the decision that I had to get online.The grounds for denial were legally baseless even when they quoted sections of the Revised Penal Code. Clearly, it was "reaching" for something to grasp at. And I was taught all throughout my education at the premier State University that citing religious dogma was the weakest kind of legal argumentation. Evidently, prejudice and bigotry is now considered sound legal opinions. COMELEC is unapologetic for its homophobia and maintains that AngLadlad LGBT Party, Inc. should not be accredited as a partylist. The Commissioners themselves have proven that the LGBT sector satisfies the first requirement of Partylists, and that it is marginalized in society by one reason or another. That fact is incontestible; but horror of horrors, they rationalize this kind of discrimination as having some kind of justification - legal or otherwise!I never had faith in the COMELEC reversing itself. It is a Constitutional body that has been known to be ruled by money and manipulated by the powers-that-be, religious organizations included. Besides, appointees would never go against their "maker", right? These officials would never get off their high horses and admit they were wrong. But pride is a common fault. Government officials are not the only ones who forget why they are in their positions in the first place - and that is to serve the greater good. Sometimes people begin to think it is "all about them" and they badly need to be reminded whose interests they are really working for. Remember, pride isn't just about LGBT visibility..it is also a cardinal sin.
Comelec:Unapologetic for its Prejudice
MANILA, Philippines - Commission on Elections Chairman Jose Melo's tie-breaking vote ended the gay group Ang Ladlad's bid to be included in the party-list elections in May 2010.
Melo's vote broke the 3-3 tie of the Comelec en banc voting on the gay group's petition seeking to overturn the Comelec Second Division's ruling rejecting Ang Ladlad as a party on "moral grounds."
The Comelec's decision is final, which means Ang Ladlad may only appeal its case with the Supreme Court.
In a ruling dated November 11, the Comelec said that although the party presented proper documents and evidence for their accreditation, their petition is "dismissible on moral grounds."
Page 5 of the ruling states that Ang Ladlad's definition of the LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender) sector as a marginalized and disadvantaged sector due to their sexual orientation "makes it crystal clear that the petitioner tolerates immorality which offends religious beliefs."
The Comelec ruling quotes passages from both the Bible and the Koran (taken from internet site www.bible.org) that describe homosexuality as "unseemly" or "transgressive."
The Comelec said accrediting Ang Ladlad would pose risks to the Filipino youth."Should this Commission grant the petition, we will be exposing our youth to an environment that does not conform to the teachings of our faith," the ruling stated
Melo's vote broke the 3-3 tie of the Comelec en banc voting on the gay group's petition seeking to overturn the Comelec Second Division's ruling rejecting Ang Ladlad as a party on "moral grounds."
The Comelec's decision is final, which means Ang Ladlad may only appeal its case with the Supreme Court.
In a ruling dated November 11, the Comelec said that although the party presented proper documents and evidence for their accreditation, their petition is "dismissible on moral grounds."
Page 5 of the ruling states that Ang Ladlad's definition of the LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender) sector as a marginalized and disadvantaged sector due to their sexual orientation "makes it crystal clear that the petitioner tolerates immorality which offends religious beliefs."
The Comelec ruling quotes passages from both the Bible and the Koran (taken from internet site www.bible.org) that describe homosexuality as "unseemly" or "transgressive."
The Comelec said accrediting Ang Ladlad would pose risks to the Filipino youth."Should this Commission grant the petition, we will be exposing our youth to an environment that does not conform to the teachings of our faith," the ruling stated
Departures
I've been dealing with a lot of "departures" lately. I mean in the real sense of departing, with friends and officemates leaving for greener pastures mostly. A longtime friend who never liked traveling in the first place suddenly uprooted herself to relocate and play housewife. Another good friend found himself growing up and needing to plan for his future family. And finally, my seeming protege on senior citizens issues, eventually grabbed an opportunity to further her elderly expertise.There is some degree of sadness - that feeling of having been left behind which I never really liked. I'm know I am "rotting" where I am right now, and I hate every minute I am forced to stay here. That is probably why I have begun thinking about making my own "escape" as well. Comfort Zones are never really good for you. You bask in the familiar never realizing you are slowly drying up your brain tissues. You lose your enthusiasm, your passion, and your creative juices no longer flow. As the saying goes, a rolling stone doesn't grow moss.I am heading for the Pre-Departure Area soon.
Everyday Bigotry
The recent events have finally jarred many LGBTs out of their complacency. COMELEC comes out with a truly homophobic decision that didnt just disqualify Ang Ladlad from being a partylist, but also judged all Filipino LGBTs as "immoral" and "a threat to the youth". Misquoting Article 201 of the Revised Penal Code, it equated being a homosexual to an obscene publication or an indecent show or exhibition; in short, "immoral" on the basis of "being contrary to good customs and morality." The essence of criminal law is that there must be an act or omission in the first place which is deemed illegal or is categorically defined as an offense. Following COMELEC's reasoning, LGBTs, by simply being themselves, and without necessarily doing anything, may now be considered unlawful. Tsk, tsk, tsk...and COMELEC is a government institution at that. Then comes, that reality TV show, Pinoy Big Brother which I never really liked. Besides being completely voyeuristic, it shows human beings at their worse. So those bigotted comments against a decent person like Rica, the resident transgender woman, are the lowest of the low. Sure, it probably raised ratings, increased viewership even and celfon networks made a bundle out of it again. But media, as a vital social agent, should consider what it reinforces in terms of prejudice. Will this TV show be allowed to perpetuate discrimination as if it's the acceptable behavior now? Is this really what we want to teach out Filipino youth - bigotry, homophobia, discrimination against others? Our youth has already responded to COMELEC's decision vs AngLadlad as shown by a survey made by the Phil Daily Inquirer. The feature was one for the books, with our young Filipinos giving COMELEC commissioners a piece of their mind. The same was true for our general public who wasted valuable celfone loads to vote off the rest of Rica's housemates. Philippine society seems to be making a point to homophobes everywhere - bigots have no place in this world....unlike sexual minorities.
Monday, November 16, 2009
Intolerance ..of Injustice
I am glad the COMELEC's recent booboo has elicited strong reactions even from non-LGBTs themselves. We are grateful for the support of senators and congressmen who have stood up for us, whether or not it is for their own political vested interests or not. Akbayan and Sen. Loren Legarda were among the first to release press statements condemning the atrocious decision. My Upsilonian senior brod, Joker Arroyo gave a laudable press statement for recognizing what we have been fighting for so long - discrimination and prejudice against LGBTs.
The media redeeemed itself of past negative portrayals of LGBTs, and even revealed itself as an instrumental LGBT ally. Various articles and editorials have taken the COMELEC to task for its arbitrariness. Fair and objective news coverage included editorials which openly criticized the COMELEC's decision by a division composed of three homophobic commissioners. Ever-popular Manolo Quezon's article provided legal insights that would put to shame commissioners with supposed-law degrees. There were calls for impeachment everywhere and the Commission on Human Rights even expressed its intention to file an intervention in support of AngLadlad. And true to form, Chairperson Leila De Lima pronounced COMELEC's actions as violative of human rights. This is quite significant because she is the first CHR Chair who has officially supported gay rights.
Particularly moving was my women's studies professor and fellow sexual rights advocate, Dr. Guy Claudio's letter. Drawing from her educational training and experience, she cited the fact that even the scientific and medical community has changed its views on homosexuality. Thus, the American Psychiatric Assoc had removed homosexuality from its list of mental disorders since the 1970s. She ended by declaring herself "gay" until Ang Ladlad gets justice.
It's good to know Filipinos are not as dumb or as clueless as the COMELEC Commissioners are. They probably thought the LGBT Community is alone in this struggle and it's OK to use their official positions to propagate religous bigotry and impose personal biases under the guise of protecting "the greater majority". Well, dear Commissioners, it appears the general public doesn't share your narrow-mindedness after all.
To date, the community of international human rights NGOs has gotten wind of this development already. I wonder how much longer the Philippine government's alleged election law representatives can stand by such folly.
The media redeeemed itself of past negative portrayals of LGBTs, and even revealed itself as an instrumental LGBT ally. Various articles and editorials have taken the COMELEC to task for its arbitrariness. Fair and objective news coverage included editorials which openly criticized the COMELEC's decision by a division composed of three homophobic commissioners. Ever-popular Manolo Quezon's article provided legal insights that would put to shame commissioners with supposed-law degrees. There were calls for impeachment everywhere and the Commission on Human Rights even expressed its intention to file an intervention in support of AngLadlad. And true to form, Chairperson Leila De Lima pronounced COMELEC's actions as violative of human rights. This is quite significant because she is the first CHR Chair who has officially supported gay rights.
Particularly moving was my women's studies professor and fellow sexual rights advocate, Dr. Guy Claudio's letter. Drawing from her educational training and experience, she cited the fact that even the scientific and medical community has changed its views on homosexuality. Thus, the American Psychiatric Assoc had removed homosexuality from its list of mental disorders since the 1970s. She ended by declaring herself "gay" until Ang Ladlad gets justice.
It's good to know Filipinos are not as dumb or as clueless as the COMELEC Commissioners are. They probably thought the LGBT Community is alone in this struggle and it's OK to use their official positions to propagate religous bigotry and impose personal biases under the guise of protecting "the greater majority". Well, dear Commissioners, it appears the general public doesn't share your narrow-mindedness after all.
To date, the community of international human rights NGOs has gotten wind of this development already. I wonder how much longer the Philippine government's alleged election law representatives can stand by such folly.
Rainbow Radio
Join Rainbow Rights Project (R-Rights) Inc. and Task Force Pride (TFP) Philippines for the launch of Rainbow Radio Pilipinas, a Lesbian Gay Bisexual and Transgender (LGBT) community-based radio magazine program and the first of its kind in the Philippines, at BED Malate on 20 November 2009, Friday at 8:00 pm. Entrance fee is waived until midnight.
Rainbow Radio Pilipinas debuts on the next day, 21 November, 2:30-3:30 PM at DWBL AM 1242 kHz, and will run every Saturday to bring updated and useful information about our community to LGBTs and friends in the country. We have prepared contests, prizes and surprises for us to better celebrate not only the launch of the radio program, but also the International Transgender Day of Remembrance (Nov. 20), the 16 Days of Activism campaign to eliminate violence against women and children (Nov. 25 to Dec. 10) and the upcoming 2009 Manila Pride March.
We hope you can join us in this night of fun and celebrate this momentous event with us. For details, you may contact Ani Diaz at musicrossroads@ yahoo.com.
Rainbow Radio Pilipinas debuts on the next day, 21 November, 2:30-3:30 PM at DWBL AM 1242 kHz, and will run every Saturday to bring updated and useful information about our community to LGBTs and friends in the country. We have prepared contests, prizes and surprises for us to better celebrate not only the launch of the radio program, but also the International Transgender Day of Remembrance (Nov. 20), the 16 Days of Activism campaign to eliminate violence against women and children (Nov. 25 to Dec. 10) and the upcoming 2009 Manila Pride March.
We hope you can join us in this night of fun and celebrate this momentous event with us. For details, you may contact Ani Diaz at musicrossroads@ yahoo.com.
Friday, November 13, 2009
Threat to the Youth?
I have been working for the DSWD since 2003. I have been involved in child rights protection, womens' welfare and development, and was quite instrumental in the violence vs women and children (VAWC) law as well as the anti-trafficking act. Now, COMELEC has declared my kind is "immoral" and a "threat to the youth"...In one sweep, COMELEC has trivialized everything that I am and have done for our Filipino youth because all this time, I have been "endangering" them pala..?
My dear COMELEC officials, if you guys remember your legal education as I do...there is such a thing in Constitutional law as "separation of Church and State". This is modern day Philippines where I believe democracy and equality are protected by the Constitution itself...(you know, that fundamental law of the land on which COMELEC bases its own existence on?). And as a fellow public officer, I know it is the State's mandate to protect ALL its citizens regardless of their religious beliefs. We should not "pontificate" on issues and concerns affecting the Filipino people because THAT IS NOT OUR BUSINESS...we leave that to the religious leaders of the different organized religions.
The COMELEC didn't even allow us the courtesy of a seeming "technical" ground for disqualification. Nope, the commissioners didn't even want to strain their brains any more than necessary. They just reverted to archaic biases and religious or "moral" rhetorics to dismiss Ang Ladlad and what we're fighting for.
My dear COMELEC officials, if you guys remember your legal education as I do...there is such a thing in Constitutional law as "separation of Church and State". This is modern day Philippines where I believe democracy and equality are protected by the Constitution itself...(you know, that fundamental law of the land on which COMELEC bases its own existence on?). And as a fellow public officer, I know it is the State's mandate to protect ALL its citizens regardless of their religious beliefs. We should not "pontificate" on issues and concerns affecting the Filipino people because THAT IS NOT OUR BUSINESS...we leave that to the religious leaders of the different organized religions.
The COMELEC didn't even allow us the courtesy of a seeming "technical" ground for disqualification. Nope, the commissioners didn't even want to strain their brains any more than necessary. They just reverted to archaic biases and religious or "moral" rhetorics to dismiss Ang Ladlad and what we're fighting for.
Blatant Homophobia
We just got word today that COMELEC has denied AngLadlad's application for partylist accreditation..and get this, on grounds of "immorality" according to the Koran and because we are "a threat to Filipino youth".
I am not surprised since I anticipated this the day I watched the TV and saw how poor Danton was grilled by those three COMELEC commissioners who sat in the hearing. One wore his religious beliefs on his sleeve as the token representative of his brethren, the second, a seeming fair and upright person betrayed his intelligence when he commented that there are enough LGBTs in Congress to represent us, and the third, a diminutive fellow showed how naive and childish his comments could be when he said that LGBTs don't experience discrimination, but are actually given preference and are favored nowadays...
These poor gentlemen may have forgotten this was not a circus or a comedy show; it was a hearing for partylist accreditation. Did they even bother to review the Partylist law and what the Philippine Constitution mandated about sectoral representation? Did they need to be reminded what "marginalization" meant in the true sense of the word? People didn't seem to have a problem understanding the concept when women were deemed disadvantaged because of their gender, or when children needed special protection because of their minority, or when farmers, fisherfolk, laborers, or the urban poor were recognized because of their economic status in society. Some will argue it is because LGBTs were not included in the "enumeration" of sectors acknowledged by the Constitution. This is the same reasoning proferred by human rights advocates when asked why LGBTs are not considered in the national human rights agenda.
The old COMELEC reason for denying AngLadlad's accreditation in 2007 at least had the semblance of propriety and rationality. it went "technical" and said we failed to prove "national membership" and regional representation. This time, it was pure, blatant homophobia which the Filipino LGBT Community cannot countenance..Such reasoning reeks of discrimination and inequality. Civil and political rights are guaranteed by international human rights documents and even our own Bill of Rights, but this ruling tells the Filipino LGBTs their political participation and right to representation is not that important.
This is an eye-opener for all of us. To those LGBTs whom still think we're doing ok and are "accepted" already, think again..COMELEC commissioners can speak about us like this as if we're the scum of the earth. To progressive legislators, policy-makers, legal professionals and human rights advocates, will you allow such declarations of personal opinions become the legal bases for decisions which will have a national impact for us all?
I am not surprised since I anticipated this the day I watched the TV and saw how poor Danton was grilled by those three COMELEC commissioners who sat in the hearing. One wore his religious beliefs on his sleeve as the token representative of his brethren, the second, a seeming fair and upright person betrayed his intelligence when he commented that there are enough LGBTs in Congress to represent us, and the third, a diminutive fellow showed how naive and childish his comments could be when he said that LGBTs don't experience discrimination, but are actually given preference and are favored nowadays...
These poor gentlemen may have forgotten this was not a circus or a comedy show; it was a hearing for partylist accreditation. Did they even bother to review the Partylist law and what the Philippine Constitution mandated about sectoral representation? Did they need to be reminded what "marginalization" meant in the true sense of the word? People didn't seem to have a problem understanding the concept when women were deemed disadvantaged because of their gender, or when children needed special protection because of their minority, or when farmers, fisherfolk, laborers, or the urban poor were recognized because of their economic status in society. Some will argue it is because LGBTs were not included in the "enumeration" of sectors acknowledged by the Constitution. This is the same reasoning proferred by human rights advocates when asked why LGBTs are not considered in the national human rights agenda.
The old COMELEC reason for denying AngLadlad's accreditation in 2007 at least had the semblance of propriety and rationality. it went "technical" and said we failed to prove "national membership" and regional representation. This time, it was pure, blatant homophobia which the Filipino LGBT Community cannot countenance..Such reasoning reeks of discrimination and inequality. Civil and political rights are guaranteed by international human rights documents and even our own Bill of Rights, but this ruling tells the Filipino LGBTs their political participation and right to representation is not that important.
This is an eye-opener for all of us. To those LGBTs whom still think we're doing ok and are "accepted" already, think again..COMELEC commissioners can speak about us like this as if we're the scum of the earth. To progressive legislators, policy-makers, legal professionals and human rights advocates, will you allow such declarations of personal opinions become the legal bases for decisions which will have a national impact for us all?
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Freedom of Expression
These past few days, I have encountered certain "communication" issues which, I personally believe, could have been handled a little better had personalities and attitudes didn't get in the way. But for people who are so used to "speaking their minds" and blurting out whatever they feel or think each time, this is certainly difficult. Thus, trouble usually results especially if someone's fragile ego gets hurt.
Here are some lessons I learned along the way, albeit the "hard" way.
"Listen, not to what is being said, but to what is NOT being said." The manner by which something is being said usually has an underlying reason. In short, someone may just be having bad day. He/she could be feeling sick, is mourning the passing of a loved one, or is simply frazzled about the distribution of relief goods. This is what you do: take a minute and understand the context of the unpleasant retort you just got. Even with your own bruised feelings, you can exhibit the utmost good faith and not think too badly of the person. You may be in a better position to exercise patience and understanding. Even when the person continues to rant, rave and ramble, take the higher moral ground and don't dignify the insults.
By no means should you resort to name-calling, cursing and sarcastic talk-back.
"Stick to the issue, and don't go historical or come up with sweeping conclusions." If it's really necessary to engage in a discussion, try to be objective and logical. High emotion only derails dialogue. As the saying goes, "forgive and forget" but that only works if things have truly been resolved. Hence, it is important not to mix things up; respond point-by-point, but avoid generalizations. I believe that is the only fair and just thing for everyone.
"The truth hurts". Certainly, the truth can really be "ugly" especially if one is faced with it quite bluntly. One has no choice but to grin and bear it. It is also the best policy to accept one's failures and weaknesses graciously, and...apologize if you must. There is no shame, only honor in it.
Yes, we all have the freedom of expression, but with every right comes a great responsibility..and that is to prevent unnecessary grief or damage. We must remember that there is always a way to keep the exchange from getting too "pedestrian" and vulgar for everyone's taste.
Here are some lessons I learned along the way, albeit the "hard" way.
"Listen, not to what is being said, but to what is NOT being said." The manner by which something is being said usually has an underlying reason. In short, someone may just be having bad day. He/she could be feeling sick, is mourning the passing of a loved one, or is simply frazzled about the distribution of relief goods. This is what you do: take a minute and understand the context of the unpleasant retort you just got. Even with your own bruised feelings, you can exhibit the utmost good faith and not think too badly of the person. You may be in a better position to exercise patience and understanding. Even when the person continues to rant, rave and ramble, take the higher moral ground and don't dignify the insults.
By no means should you resort to name-calling, cursing and sarcastic talk-back.
"Stick to the issue, and don't go historical or come up with sweeping conclusions." If it's really necessary to engage in a discussion, try to be objective and logical. High emotion only derails dialogue. As the saying goes, "forgive and forget" but that only works if things have truly been resolved. Hence, it is important not to mix things up; respond point-by-point, but avoid generalizations. I believe that is the only fair and just thing for everyone.
"The truth hurts". Certainly, the truth can really be "ugly" especially if one is faced with it quite bluntly. One has no choice but to grin and bear it. It is also the best policy to accept one's failures and weaknesses graciously, and...apologize if you must. There is no shame, only honor in it.
Yes, we all have the freedom of expression, but with every right comes a great responsibility..and that is to prevent unnecessary grief or damage. We must remember that there is always a way to keep the exchange from getting too "pedestrian" and vulgar for everyone's taste.
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
R-Rts' Lesbian Calligraphy
Rainbow Rights Project (R-Rights), Inc. would like to invite you to its latest Dyke Dialogues, "Lesbian Calligraphy: a Forum on Philippine Lesbian Literature and Erotica". It will be held at the Bernal Gallery, UP Film Institute, Diliman, QC from 1-5PM, on November 7, 2009, Saturday .
UP Sappho founder Libay Linsangan-Cantor will give an overview on Philippine Lesbian Literature, while freelance writer Roda Novenario will share some insights on erotica and pornograpy. There will also be a legal discussion on pornography and censorship by R-Rights' Germaine Leonin.
Hope to see you there!
UP Sappho founder Libay Linsangan-Cantor will give an overview on Philippine Lesbian Literature, while freelance writer Roda Novenario will share some insights on erotica and pornograpy. There will also be a legal discussion on pornography and censorship by R-Rights' Germaine Leonin.
Hope to see you there!
Monday, October 12, 2009
Lessons from the Past
With all these disasters and calamities happening lately, I remember that as a schoolkid these pieces of news become part of current events which you must take note of as well.
But speaking of lessons, didn't we all learn something about science and history along the way? Why are we so surprised that we feel betrayed by our environment?
A few years ago, a fellow named Felino Palafox already pointed out the inevitable flooding of some areas near Pasig River and Laguna Lake because time will come, rainwater had nowhere to go. Another science geek named Dr. Kelvin Rodolfo, who is more popularly known for the Pinatubo Volcano "aftermath" studies, also had a research going on land subsidence and worsening floods along northern Manila Bay. The government was duly warned, but changing administrations never had the political will to safeguard the environment and temper urban development with an awareness of nature.
I only have to look to my youth to remember lessons from the past. The area in front of Quezon Institute, where Puregold now stands, use to have a sea of kang-kongs all year round. Yes, it was a virtual swampland and for good reason; that was where water went everytime it rained. Besides Puregold, I now see a mini eco-forest in the frontage of QI. I wonder what it does for residents in the area everytime it rains nowadays...
Having gone to UP Los Banos for university in the late 1980s, I always marveled at the green mountains of Makiling then. By the time I left in 1990, subdivisions were sprouting everywhere in Laguna. Whole mountainsides were carved into by developers for hot spring resorts or residential villages.Trees were chopped off indiscriminately. It came as no surprise when the national highway near Los Banos bayan would have an occasional landslide very now and then.
Now, I am told the municipalities of Rizal and Laguna where I did my undergraduate thesis on "Integrated Farming" are still submerged in knee-deep floods. The areas of Paete, Pangil, Pakil, etc. had the privilege of a lake which naturally irrigated their ricefields with its regular rising tides. It also allowed them to have fishponds as alternate sources of livelihood. Up in the forested hills, the people had fruit-bearing trees for additional income. From Los Banos to Lumban, Laguna Lake has now reclaimed what it rightfully owned.
Up north, Bulacan and Pampanga's flooding was also expected. Regardless of the rivers and dams it hosts, the area has the Candaba Swamp, a historically low-lying area. (My father used to tell us stories of having hid from the Japanese soldiers by staying in the swamps for days on end. For a time, he had us wondering why he hated watermelon and galunggong so much. But he merely replied that it reminded him of his guerilla days in the marshes.)
In Pangasinan, towns whose economies depended on bangus farming, naturally got flooded. Fishponds located on similar marshland areas such as Dagupan, would expectedly overflow with heavy rainfall. Let us not forget that there is also the mighty Agno River, a major tributary which traverses the length of Pangasinan.
Already Lingayen and Dagupan experienced some changes in its topography following the Big Quake in 1991. La Union's coastline itself changed, with the beaches of Bauang, Agoo and San Fernando "shortening", thereby forcing beach resorts and fishing communities to adjust their beach frontages accordingly.
I guess people living in similar situations would now need to do the same thing for themselves. As it is often said, "Nature finds a way", so maybe so should people.
But speaking of lessons, didn't we all learn something about science and history along the way? Why are we so surprised that we feel betrayed by our environment?
A few years ago, a fellow named Felino Palafox already pointed out the inevitable flooding of some areas near Pasig River and Laguna Lake because time will come, rainwater had nowhere to go. Another science geek named Dr. Kelvin Rodolfo, who is more popularly known for the Pinatubo Volcano "aftermath" studies, also had a research going on land subsidence and worsening floods along northern Manila Bay. The government was duly warned, but changing administrations never had the political will to safeguard the environment and temper urban development with an awareness of nature.
I only have to look to my youth to remember lessons from the past. The area in front of Quezon Institute, where Puregold now stands, use to have a sea of kang-kongs all year round. Yes, it was a virtual swampland and for good reason; that was where water went everytime it rained. Besides Puregold, I now see a mini eco-forest in the frontage of QI. I wonder what it does for residents in the area everytime it rains nowadays...
Having gone to UP Los Banos for university in the late 1980s, I always marveled at the green mountains of Makiling then. By the time I left in 1990, subdivisions were sprouting everywhere in Laguna. Whole mountainsides were carved into by developers for hot spring resorts or residential villages.Trees were chopped off indiscriminately. It came as no surprise when the national highway near Los Banos bayan would have an occasional landslide very now and then.
Now, I am told the municipalities of Rizal and Laguna where I did my undergraduate thesis on "Integrated Farming" are still submerged in knee-deep floods. The areas of Paete, Pangil, Pakil, etc. had the privilege of a lake which naturally irrigated their ricefields with its regular rising tides. It also allowed them to have fishponds as alternate sources of livelihood. Up in the forested hills, the people had fruit-bearing trees for additional income. From Los Banos to Lumban, Laguna Lake has now reclaimed what it rightfully owned.
Up north, Bulacan and Pampanga's flooding was also expected. Regardless of the rivers and dams it hosts, the area has the Candaba Swamp, a historically low-lying area. (My father used to tell us stories of having hid from the Japanese soldiers by staying in the swamps for days on end. For a time, he had us wondering why he hated watermelon and galunggong so much. But he merely replied that it reminded him of his guerilla days in the marshes.)
In Pangasinan, towns whose economies depended on bangus farming, naturally got flooded. Fishponds located on similar marshland areas such as Dagupan, would expectedly overflow with heavy rainfall. Let us not forget that there is also the mighty Agno River, a major tributary which traverses the length of Pangasinan.
Already Lingayen and Dagupan experienced some changes in its topography following the Big Quake in 1991. La Union's coastline itself changed, with the beaches of Bauang, Agoo and San Fernando "shortening", thereby forcing beach resorts and fishing communities to adjust their beach frontages accordingly.
I guess people living in similar situations would now need to do the same thing for themselves. As it is often said, "Nature finds a way", so maybe so should people.
Aftermath
Typhoons Ondoy and Pepeng have gone, but most of us still suffer from its aftermath. At least two friends from the Marikina area had to abandon the luxury of their condos and stay with their parents for a while. Two more friends from Pasig still have houses underwater and are seriously considering moving residence to Quezon City.
While I was ironically spared the floods, given that I live somewhere near Araneta Avenue which usually floods, my immediate family wasn't as lucky. My eldest brother's bungalow in Rosario, Pasig was completely submerged along with three cars. From the stories they candidly tell, they were having breakfast one moment and scrambling for their dear lives the next minute. They practically had to climb walls and jump roof to roof to get to a neighbor's 2nd-story house to save themselves. They spoke of staying in a small room, together with other "neighbor- refugees" and sharing a two-pack noodle soup with 20 other people. They are staying another week at our youngest sister's house even when the waters had already receded, since there was still mud around and my sister-in-law's foot already got infected.
Ate Rhoda wasn't the only one injured. Dra. Che, our dentist sister, braved the floods and currents of Quezon Ave and Araneta Ave to get to St. Theresa's that fateful Saturday night. She and my youngest sister, Gayle was suppose to pick up my stranded niece, Abby who had a ballet class earlier. Unfortunately, Dra. Che fell into a manhole....wait, let me correct that, she fell into one of those diggings left uncovered by either one of our beloved utility companies. We were all thankful she didn't drown, but she did bash her head on something and her bruises and deep scratches stretch from her elbow, hip to her leg and ankle.
Speaking of unattended diggings, Dra.Che isn't the only one with a beef with our utility companies who are so fond of "destroying" our streets. My cousin, Edlyn personally took to task a particular waterworks company doing consistent diggings in the Kamias area. The local government had already installed bigger pipes and canals to drain away rainwater which periodically inundate Kamias. However, with the diggings constantly going on, the dirt and sand had blocked most of the canals and probably even clogged the pipes. As such, many streets in the East Kamias area were flooded with water entering most homes which were previously safe being on high ground.
Meanwhile, another sister and I are working for DSWD. Most of our direct services staff have been deployed to help with relief work, with technical staff being asked to augment manpower. Sadly, some of our own DSWD staff were flood victims themselves, and that includes an Undersecretary. Everyone is still reeling from the devastation. While DSWD-NCR, Field Office 3 and 4-A are still busy attending to the needs of typhoon Ondoy victims, DSWD -CAR, Field Offices 1 and 2 are likewise faced with dealing with Pepeng's flood and landslide victims in their respective regions.
We have no choice but to grin and bear it. We can only rely on the characteristic resilience of Filipinos and our unique Bayanihan spirit. Maybe we shall surprise ourselves yet again with our strength and capacity to deal with change.
While I was ironically spared the floods, given that I live somewhere near Araneta Avenue which usually floods, my immediate family wasn't as lucky. My eldest brother's bungalow in Rosario, Pasig was completely submerged along with three cars. From the stories they candidly tell, they were having breakfast one moment and scrambling for their dear lives the next minute. They practically had to climb walls and jump roof to roof to get to a neighbor's 2nd-story house to save themselves. They spoke of staying in a small room, together with other "neighbor- refugees" and sharing a two-pack noodle soup with 20 other people. They are staying another week at our youngest sister's house even when the waters had already receded, since there was still mud around and my sister-in-law's foot already got infected.
Ate Rhoda wasn't the only one injured. Dra. Che, our dentist sister, braved the floods and currents of Quezon Ave and Araneta Ave to get to St. Theresa's that fateful Saturday night. She and my youngest sister, Gayle was suppose to pick up my stranded niece, Abby who had a ballet class earlier. Unfortunately, Dra. Che fell into a manhole....wait, let me correct that, she fell into one of those diggings left uncovered by either one of our beloved utility companies. We were all thankful she didn't drown, but she did bash her head on something and her bruises and deep scratches stretch from her elbow, hip to her leg and ankle.
Speaking of unattended diggings, Dra.Che isn't the only one with a beef with our utility companies who are so fond of "destroying" our streets. My cousin, Edlyn personally took to task a particular waterworks company doing consistent diggings in the Kamias area. The local government had already installed bigger pipes and canals to drain away rainwater which periodically inundate Kamias. However, with the diggings constantly going on, the dirt and sand had blocked most of the canals and probably even clogged the pipes. As such, many streets in the East Kamias area were flooded with water entering most homes which were previously safe being on high ground.
Meanwhile, another sister and I are working for DSWD. Most of our direct services staff have been deployed to help with relief work, with technical staff being asked to augment manpower. Sadly, some of our own DSWD staff were flood victims themselves, and that includes an Undersecretary. Everyone is still reeling from the devastation. While DSWD-NCR, Field Office 3 and 4-A are still busy attending to the needs of typhoon Ondoy victims, DSWD -CAR, Field Offices 1 and 2 are likewise faced with dealing with Pepeng's flood and landslide victims in their respective regions.
We have no choice but to grin and bear it. We can only rely on the characteristic resilience of Filipinos and our unique Bayanihan spirit. Maybe we shall surprise ourselves yet again with our strength and capacity to deal with change.
Waterworld
I grew up used to the annual rainy season floods. We lived in a residential area in Quezon City which was close to a creek, so naturally, we expected to be inundated regularly.
My younger sisters and I never really played in floods, unlike our older siblings and cousins who use to ride salbabidas (tire interiors) and frolic around in an expanded “public pool” in the late 60s and early 70s. Of course, the creek waters coming from as far away as Marikina were not as filled with assorted trash and garbage as they became during my time.
My sisters and I learned early on to watch out for heavy rains. At night, while everyone else was enjoying the cool weather brought about by rainfall and sleeping so soundly, we were programmed to listen to the intensity of the rainfall and to determine just how much rain has already fallen in a certain period of time. Thus, it became automatic for all of us in our household: we listened for the neighbors nearest the creeks, our dogs barking and warning us of rising waters in our garage.
We knew how to open the gates at the perfect time to keep the waters from trapping us inside our own home and before it becomes impossible to move it against the water pressure. We had to move our cars to higher ground, just a few blocks away, as soon as the water reaches half the tires and before it gets above the muffler. We also got to our dogs just in time to take them to safety lest they drown in our yard.
Inside our house, we had devised a system for raising our various furniture and electrical appliances. Mostly females, we relied on our body strength and adrenalin to put the sofa, the stove-oven, even the refrigerator on chairs or beer cases. Two-by-two we worked; one hand on the furniture and the other, to stuff something under it as quickly as possible and bring it up. Our mayordoma could even carry a whole sack of rice by herself without any help.
Besides listening to the rain, opening the gates in time, and having a system for raising household things, my father had other tips for us. Once the water level comes up to the electrical sockets, head for the fusebox and turn down the switch to prevent electrocution. It was also advisable to keep bottles of dangerous chemicals from being submerged and mixing with the water. Such contaminants could be more harmful than dirty floodwater to human skin if you’re still wading around.
Speaking of pollutants on skin, make sure you bathe and wash really well after frolicking in floodwaters. You can even use alcohol just to disinfect your body. Besides garbage and other refuse, sometimes human or animal waste floats around in the water too. Nobody wants to catch cholera or leptospirosis (that disease that comes from rat waste), much less die from it.
Floods seem inevitable in Manila, so we might as well learn to prepare for it and cope with it the best way we can. But while we can do our best to salvage whatever belongings we have, it’s our safety and well-being that should be our utmost concern always.
My younger sisters and I never really played in floods, unlike our older siblings and cousins who use to ride salbabidas (tire interiors) and frolic around in an expanded “public pool” in the late 60s and early 70s. Of course, the creek waters coming from as far away as Marikina were not as filled with assorted trash and garbage as they became during my time.
My sisters and I learned early on to watch out for heavy rains. At night, while everyone else was enjoying the cool weather brought about by rainfall and sleeping so soundly, we were programmed to listen to the intensity of the rainfall and to determine just how much rain has already fallen in a certain period of time. Thus, it became automatic for all of us in our household: we listened for the neighbors nearest the creeks, our dogs barking and warning us of rising waters in our garage.
We knew how to open the gates at the perfect time to keep the waters from trapping us inside our own home and before it becomes impossible to move it against the water pressure. We had to move our cars to higher ground, just a few blocks away, as soon as the water reaches half the tires and before it gets above the muffler. We also got to our dogs just in time to take them to safety lest they drown in our yard.
Inside our house, we had devised a system for raising our various furniture and electrical appliances. Mostly females, we relied on our body strength and adrenalin to put the sofa, the stove-oven, even the refrigerator on chairs or beer cases. Two-by-two we worked; one hand on the furniture and the other, to stuff something under it as quickly as possible and bring it up. Our mayordoma could even carry a whole sack of rice by herself without any help.
Besides listening to the rain, opening the gates in time, and having a system for raising household things, my father had other tips for us. Once the water level comes up to the electrical sockets, head for the fusebox and turn down the switch to prevent electrocution. It was also advisable to keep bottles of dangerous chemicals from being submerged and mixing with the water. Such contaminants could be more harmful than dirty floodwater to human skin if you’re still wading around.
Speaking of pollutants on skin, make sure you bathe and wash really well after frolicking in floodwaters. You can even use alcohol just to disinfect your body. Besides garbage and other refuse, sometimes human or animal waste floats around in the water too. Nobody wants to catch cholera or leptospirosis (that disease that comes from rat waste), much less die from it.
Floods seem inevitable in Manila, so we might as well learn to prepare for it and cope with it the best way we can. But while we can do our best to salvage whatever belongings we have, it’s our safety and well-being that should be our utmost concern always.
The Great Equalizer
Floods - the great equalizer, as my Dad used to say. In the Philippines, the rainy season usually brings floods in low-lying areas, typhoon or no typhoon. So both rich and poor, gather their worldly possessions, however measly, and rush to higher ground once the waterways overflow. We have come to expect such inconveniences and we prepare ourselves and adjust our daily living as best as we can. In fact, Filipinos have become so used to "surprise downpours" that umbrellas and jackets are commonly stuffed in our bags once we leave the house. We never really relied on PAGASA that much..since nobody is really that dependable when it comes to typhoons. But nothing could have prepared anyone for what happened last weekend.
I was in Naga City when typhoon Ondoy first made landfall Friday PM. I was among its first victims, as I became stranded along with other travelers in the Bicol region. There was some wind and the skies were so cloudy the planes from Manila were simply sent back. I grumbled since I was worried about not leaving Jeni some extra cash. Sure there were still some groceries in the cupboard, but I failed to give Jeni some pocket money in case of emergencies. Naturally, Jeni was upset, but we both hoped I could get a return flight by the next day.
Saturday morning, I trudged back to the Naga airport. The Mnl-Naga-Mnl flights were back to normal, but by noon it was announced that our flight out would be delayed. We were told the planes could not leave Mnl since it was zero visibility due to heavy rains. I was part of the crowd that groaned in exasperation. We didn't realize what Manila residents were going through already. It wasn't until one of the passengers started laughing that it all dawned on us - he got a text message from a friend who took a land-trip the day before and that friend was stranded somewhere in Laguna because of floods.
I was texting Jeni since I knew our area in Araneta Avenue always flooded. I hoped she went home early after her call center shift. But true Jeni-fashion, she didn't; and instead, attended her team-building activity (read: drinking spree) somewhere in España. As such, she had to deal with the flood waters which were already rising to dangerous levels. Her last text to me at around 1:30PM was that she was somewhere near Araneta Ave at a waiting shed, soaked to the bone. She said she had to "wade" in floodwaters almost reaching up to a person's shoulders. Ok, that wasn't wading..that was swimming! And Jeni is by no means exceptionally "tall"...she's only 5 ft. for God's sake! And I shouldn't panic?! :( She would tell me later that a whole bus was submerged near Puregold - Araneta. Of course, she was still upset with me for pushing through with this trip. And I could understand why she would hate me now. Jeni doesn't really like thunderstorms and she has trouble sleeping when I am not around.
I started texting my family and friends as well. My family lives in the Kamias area which usually floods. At around 2PM, they said they were fine and they were more worried about me. They told me not to push through with my flight since it was dangerous. I had to tell them later my flight was eventually cancelled anyway. Both my sister and cousin fortunately have high, four-wheel drive vehicles, but they were unable to deal with the heavy traffic in the surrounding areas. They couldn't go near Katipunan or Quezon Ave. so my two nieces were stranded at Miriam College and St. Theresa's, respectively. All this time, I didn't know my eldest brother and his family in Pasig were in more dire straits. Their bungalow was located in Rosario and their house was submerged in floodwaters even before lunch.
At this point, celfone signals were getting quirky already. Also, flooded areas have since lost electricity because MERALCO prudently shut power to prevent accidental electrocutions. I went back to the hotel and watched the news. The information was very sketchy; government agencies seemed clueless at what to do next. I went out to look for an internet cafe to get better insights on Manila's floods. Nothing useful except making some lucky contacts with those who were safe and sound in their own homes.
Times like these, survival instincts make us watch out for our own safety first. But after securing ourselves, we begin to wonder about the people we love. We frantically try to contact family members and friends to check on their welfare. Times like these, we begin to realize what is important - not our cars, not our laptops, not even our celfones except to find out about our loved ones. For the rich and the poor, it's not material things that matter anymore, but people's lives.
I was in Naga City when typhoon Ondoy first made landfall Friday PM. I was among its first victims, as I became stranded along with other travelers in the Bicol region. There was some wind and the skies were so cloudy the planes from Manila were simply sent back. I grumbled since I was worried about not leaving Jeni some extra cash. Sure there were still some groceries in the cupboard, but I failed to give Jeni some pocket money in case of emergencies. Naturally, Jeni was upset, but we both hoped I could get a return flight by the next day.
Saturday morning, I trudged back to the Naga airport. The Mnl-Naga-Mnl flights were back to normal, but by noon it was announced that our flight out would be delayed. We were told the planes could not leave Mnl since it was zero visibility due to heavy rains. I was part of the crowd that groaned in exasperation. We didn't realize what Manila residents were going through already. It wasn't until one of the passengers started laughing that it all dawned on us - he got a text message from a friend who took a land-trip the day before and that friend was stranded somewhere in Laguna because of floods.
I was texting Jeni since I knew our area in Araneta Avenue always flooded. I hoped she went home early after her call center shift. But true Jeni-fashion, she didn't; and instead, attended her team-building activity (read: drinking spree) somewhere in España. As such, she had to deal with the flood waters which were already rising to dangerous levels. Her last text to me at around 1:30PM was that she was somewhere near Araneta Ave at a waiting shed, soaked to the bone. She said she had to "wade" in floodwaters almost reaching up to a person's shoulders. Ok, that wasn't wading..that was swimming! And Jeni is by no means exceptionally "tall"...she's only 5 ft. for God's sake! And I shouldn't panic?! :( She would tell me later that a whole bus was submerged near Puregold - Araneta. Of course, she was still upset with me for pushing through with this trip. And I could understand why she would hate me now. Jeni doesn't really like thunderstorms and she has trouble sleeping when I am not around.
I started texting my family and friends as well. My family lives in the Kamias area which usually floods. At around 2PM, they said they were fine and they were more worried about me. They told me not to push through with my flight since it was dangerous. I had to tell them later my flight was eventually cancelled anyway. Both my sister and cousin fortunately have high, four-wheel drive vehicles, but they were unable to deal with the heavy traffic in the surrounding areas. They couldn't go near Katipunan or Quezon Ave. so my two nieces were stranded at Miriam College and St. Theresa's, respectively. All this time, I didn't know my eldest brother and his family in Pasig were in more dire straits. Their bungalow was located in Rosario and their house was submerged in floodwaters even before lunch.
At this point, celfone signals were getting quirky already. Also, flooded areas have since lost electricity because MERALCO prudently shut power to prevent accidental electrocutions. I went back to the hotel and watched the news. The information was very sketchy; government agencies seemed clueless at what to do next. I went out to look for an internet cafe to get better insights on Manila's floods. Nothing useful except making some lucky contacts with those who were safe and sound in their own homes.
Times like these, survival instincts make us watch out for our own safety first. But after securing ourselves, we begin to wonder about the people we love. We frantically try to contact family members and friends to check on their welfare. Times like these, we begin to realize what is important - not our cars, not our laptops, not even our celfones except to find out about our loved ones. For the rich and the poor, it's not material things that matter anymore, but people's lives.
Stories
I have always been fond of short stories. When I was first introduced to the fiction genre in high school, I began to cultivate an affinity for the brief and concise presentation of simple plots. Never mind that occasionally I had to endure a novella or novellete as classroom reading; I wanted it “short and sweet”. After I had exhausted the required reading for English literature class, I turned to my family library and found a classic O’Henry collection, “The Chapparal Prince and other Stories”, as well as a four-volume Guy Mauppasant compilation. But while I enjoyed similar stories by John Galsworthy (“Quality”), James Thurber (Scarlet Ibis”) and James Joyce (Araby”), I had a penchant for Edgar Allan Poe’s dark and mysterious writing. As such, stories like “A Rose for Emily” and “A Cask of Amontillado” were my favorites.
In college, my weekends in Los Banos were also spent reading. My Villareal cousins had an Edgar Allan Poe anthology in their library, so after going through compulsory readings of “The Good Earth” and “Love in the Time of Cholera”, I devoured Poe’s “The Tell-tale Heart”, “Curse of the Red Masque”, and The Black Cat”.
Later, I discovered Stephen King’s short story collections. The first one, “Night Shift”, included classic horror stories like “Children of the Corn”, “Silver Bullet” and “Trucks” (better known as “Maximum Overdrive”) which had all been made into Hollywood films. His other installments, “Skeleton Crew” and “Four Past Midnight” had “The Body” (which became “Stand By Me” in the movies), “Secret Window” (starring Johnny Depp as a depressed writer accused of plagiarism) and one recently released, “The Mist” about scientific experiments going wrong and affecting nature. He also wrote under the name “Richard Bachman” and came up with a four-story anthology, two of which became movies - “Thinner” and “Total Recall”, starring Arnold Schwazennagger and Sharon Stone.
Other lesser known selections by Steve King like “The Mangler” and “Word Processor of the Gods” were regularly featured in TV series such as “Tales from the Darkside”, “Twilight Zone” and “Amazing Stories”. It was because of these television shows that I became acquainted with Ray Bradbury. These shows also featured Ray Bradbury classics such as “The Wind” which was actually about a banshee tormenting a writer, and “Company”, the one about a sickly boy’s dog whom he regularly sends out to tell him about what’s going on outside, and who eventually brings home one day a new friend for the boy.
When I was cooped up at home recently, I had the opportunity to catch up on my reading again. Jeni gave me a bunch of books to keep me still and in bed for most of the week. Most of it were her own grandmother’s collections and the books’ pages were really brittle already. I didn’t realize that one of them was a classic Alfred Hitchcock – “Twelve Stories for the Late Night”. Most of the short stories were circa 1930s, 40s and 50s by highly acclaimed writers such as Ray Bradbury, Evelyn Waugh, Robert Arthur, Philip MacDonald, Frank Belknap Long, Will F. Jenkins, and John Collier. And they kept me in bed alright. I was captivated; I was in complete awe. Long before there was Stephen King, there were these writers - true masters of the craft. For indeed, with their words they were able to describe sceneries with such vision, capture images and feelings almost palpable to the senses. Their individual pieces were really works of art; they were what writing was truly about. But I am afraid this book is, by now, out of print. I doubt it if some university libraries even have a copy of it. It sold, for the first time in paperback, for a mere 50cents it says on its cover. To the lucky ones who may have this in their personal collections, treasure it...for it is truly “vintage” reading material.
In college, my weekends in Los Banos were also spent reading. My Villareal cousins had an Edgar Allan Poe anthology in their library, so after going through compulsory readings of “The Good Earth” and “Love in the Time of Cholera”, I devoured Poe’s “The Tell-tale Heart”, “Curse of the Red Masque”, and The Black Cat”.
Later, I discovered Stephen King’s short story collections. The first one, “Night Shift”, included classic horror stories like “Children of the Corn”, “Silver Bullet” and “Trucks” (better known as “Maximum Overdrive”) which had all been made into Hollywood films. His other installments, “Skeleton Crew” and “Four Past Midnight” had “The Body” (which became “Stand By Me” in the movies), “Secret Window” (starring Johnny Depp as a depressed writer accused of plagiarism) and one recently released, “The Mist” about scientific experiments going wrong and affecting nature. He also wrote under the name “Richard Bachman” and came up with a four-story anthology, two of which became movies - “Thinner” and “Total Recall”, starring Arnold Schwazennagger and Sharon Stone.
Other lesser known selections by Steve King like “The Mangler” and “Word Processor of the Gods” were regularly featured in TV series such as “Tales from the Darkside”, “Twilight Zone” and “Amazing Stories”. It was because of these television shows that I became acquainted with Ray Bradbury. These shows also featured Ray Bradbury classics such as “The Wind” which was actually about a banshee tormenting a writer, and “Company”, the one about a sickly boy’s dog whom he regularly sends out to tell him about what’s going on outside, and who eventually brings home one day a new friend for the boy.
When I was cooped up at home recently, I had the opportunity to catch up on my reading again. Jeni gave me a bunch of books to keep me still and in bed for most of the week. Most of it were her own grandmother’s collections and the books’ pages were really brittle already. I didn’t realize that one of them was a classic Alfred Hitchcock – “Twelve Stories for the Late Night”. Most of the short stories were circa 1930s, 40s and 50s by highly acclaimed writers such as Ray Bradbury, Evelyn Waugh, Robert Arthur, Philip MacDonald, Frank Belknap Long, Will F. Jenkins, and John Collier. And they kept me in bed alright. I was captivated; I was in complete awe. Long before there was Stephen King, there were these writers - true masters of the craft. For indeed, with their words they were able to describe sceneries with such vision, capture images and feelings almost palpable to the senses. Their individual pieces were really works of art; they were what writing was truly about. But I am afraid this book is, by now, out of print. I doubt it if some university libraries even have a copy of it. It sold, for the first time in paperback, for a mere 50cents it says on its cover. To the lucky ones who may have this in their personal collections, treasure it...for it is truly “vintage” reading material.
Of Girlfriends and Snoring
I was out-of-commission for a week. I had always wanted an extended weekend that I couldn’t wait for the next typhoon to hit or the next national holiday to be announced. I must’ve prayed so hard, I finally got my wish…but with dire consequences.
It all started after the Policy Analysis Training in August. After a week of blissfully cool weather up in Antipolo, I came back to a humid and polluted city air. My asthma naturally acted up and I endured it together with my allergic rhinitis for several mornings. I presumed the sniffles and coughing would all go away soon enough. By the second week, there was already phlegm in my lungs and Jeni complained my snoring at night was worse than before. I apologized for her sleepless nights and explained my clogged nose didn’t help my deviated septum any (a condition I inherited from my father). When I started feeling feverish, we both wondered if it was sinusitis already. But I should have known the cold sweats I was having in the afternoons and at night was not normal.
And then the timing of the fevers became strange. I would get them late in the afternoons until evening. The next morning, I’d still have a slightly raised temperature and would feel too sluggish. Midday, I would feel better for a couple of hours until around 4 or 5PM when I would get feverish all over again. All this time, Jeni would be waking me up in the middle of the night because my snoring was also becoming too weird for her. When before, she would be bothered by the gaps in my breathing, long periods when I seem to have stopped breathing, now it was the gasping sounds that I made. She began to panic when she noticed that I sounded like I was “drowning” one night. The very next day, she hustled me off to St. Lukes.
I was diagnosed with upper respiratory infection which was already on the brink of broncho-pneumonia. It was my fault for not paying attention to my cough even when I started feeling phlegm in my lungs. I honestly thought it was just my asthma. Malay ko ba…
I owe it all to my partner, Jeni, for noticing the slight changes in my physiological habits. I may be a horrible roommate because of my snoring, but she has learned to recognize what was ‘normal’ sleep-breathing for me. I wouldn’t know half the time since I was obviously unconscious, right? The night I seemed to be “drowning” Jeni was downstairs, having just arrived from her nightshift. I must’ve scared the hell out of her since she willingly took a leave from work the next day to accompany me to the hospital. Correction, it was by her insistence that I finally thought of consulting a doctor.
Now, the fevers are gone but I am still on antibiotics. I have an alka seltzer-type of mucolytic to dissolve the phlegm and also a decongestant-paracetamol to ensure the sniffles are controlled. And of course, there’s Jeni who must now constantly monitor my snoring for any changes in my health condition. Here’s to heroic girlfriends!
It all started after the Policy Analysis Training in August. After a week of blissfully cool weather up in Antipolo, I came back to a humid and polluted city air. My asthma naturally acted up and I endured it together with my allergic rhinitis for several mornings. I presumed the sniffles and coughing would all go away soon enough. By the second week, there was already phlegm in my lungs and Jeni complained my snoring at night was worse than before. I apologized for her sleepless nights and explained my clogged nose didn’t help my deviated septum any (a condition I inherited from my father). When I started feeling feverish, we both wondered if it was sinusitis already. But I should have known the cold sweats I was having in the afternoons and at night was not normal.
And then the timing of the fevers became strange. I would get them late in the afternoons until evening. The next morning, I’d still have a slightly raised temperature and would feel too sluggish. Midday, I would feel better for a couple of hours until around 4 or 5PM when I would get feverish all over again. All this time, Jeni would be waking me up in the middle of the night because my snoring was also becoming too weird for her. When before, she would be bothered by the gaps in my breathing, long periods when I seem to have stopped breathing, now it was the gasping sounds that I made. She began to panic when she noticed that I sounded like I was “drowning” one night. The very next day, she hustled me off to St. Lukes.
I was diagnosed with upper respiratory infection which was already on the brink of broncho-pneumonia. It was my fault for not paying attention to my cough even when I started feeling phlegm in my lungs. I honestly thought it was just my asthma. Malay ko ba…
I owe it all to my partner, Jeni, for noticing the slight changes in my physiological habits. I may be a horrible roommate because of my snoring, but she has learned to recognize what was ‘normal’ sleep-breathing for me. I wouldn’t know half the time since I was obviously unconscious, right? The night I seemed to be “drowning” Jeni was downstairs, having just arrived from her nightshift. I must’ve scared the hell out of her since she willingly took a leave from work the next day to accompany me to the hospital. Correction, it was by her insistence that I finally thought of consulting a doctor.
Now, the fevers are gone but I am still on antibiotics. I have an alka seltzer-type of mucolytic to dissolve the phlegm and also a decongestant-paracetamol to ensure the sniffles are controlled. And of course, there’s Jeni who must now constantly monitor my snoring for any changes in my health condition. Here’s to heroic girlfriends!
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Reality Check
Funny that I am reminded of my mortality every so often by the jarring statements my body makes. Admittedly, I tend to overdo it sometimes...never realizing that this poor vessel has weathered the wear and tear of time quite admirably. But now, the years of neglect and abuse may have taken their toll.
Don't get me wrong, I have stayed away from the usual bodily contaminants of cigarettes and alcohol for the simple reason that I have allergies. But it doesn't mean I don't have my own set of vices like Coke, a fondness for grilled meat, and late nights. Add to that the unavoidable lifestyle factors of stress, lack of exercise, and a constantly busy, if not hectic, schedule.
Forced to take it easy because of another bout with illness, I took stock of my life. Indeed, I am in the last days of my 30s. Looking back, I had a good run, if I must say so. But there is still so much I could've done..The biological clock is still loudly clanging, quite grandfatherly-like in fact...and I now look fondly at my friends' kids, musing that childcare couldn't be any worse than taking care of a couple of pets. I've survived quite a few naughty puppies after all...
(I may not look it..but I think I would make a great parent. You don't believe me? Ask my numerous nephews and nieces..they all learned a lot from me because I never gave them any b..sh. t. Look at my pet dogs too...they all have personalities and are extremely well-trained).
But the days are swiflty passing...we never really know what's going to come tomorrow. What matters is today and how we live it. Remember, it's the things that we haven't done that we feel regret for...not what we have actually done. Those things, good or bad, we can eventually learn to live with.
Don't get me wrong, I have stayed away from the usual bodily contaminants of cigarettes and alcohol for the simple reason that I have allergies. But it doesn't mean I don't have my own set of vices like Coke, a fondness for grilled meat, and late nights. Add to that the unavoidable lifestyle factors of stress, lack of exercise, and a constantly busy, if not hectic, schedule.
Forced to take it easy because of another bout with illness, I took stock of my life. Indeed, I am in the last days of my 30s. Looking back, I had a good run, if I must say so. But there is still so much I could've done..The biological clock is still loudly clanging, quite grandfatherly-like in fact...and I now look fondly at my friends' kids, musing that childcare couldn't be any worse than taking care of a couple of pets. I've survived quite a few naughty puppies after all...
(I may not look it..but I think I would make a great parent. You don't believe me? Ask my numerous nephews and nieces..they all learned a lot from me because I never gave them any b..sh. t. Look at my pet dogs too...they all have personalities and are extremely well-trained).
But the days are swiflty passing...we never really know what's going to come tomorrow. What matters is today and how we live it. Remember, it's the things that we haven't done that we feel regret for...not what we have actually done. Those things, good or bad, we can eventually learn to live with.
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
R-Rights Thanks Astraea & Friends
As we come to almost the end of a funding season, R-Rights would like to take this opportunity to say thank you to our funder, Astraea Lesbian Foundation for Justice, and to all our partners who shared our big dream of having LGBT forums that are light and informal (ok, technically they are also about LGBT rights under criminal, civil, family, election, and labor laws but they were never boring). While the forums were rational, objective and informed, they were opportunities for fun, laughter, and inspiration as we also talked about our experiences and our successes as a community.
Its humble beginnings started with its “outing” on June 24, 2005 through a Round-Table Discussion on LGBT rights and Philippine Law at the University of the Philippines Center for Women Studies. After the discussion, R-Rights embarked on its Rainbow Exchange/Dyke Dialogue Series, with out-of-pocket funding and the kindness of friends.• DYKE DIALOGUES: OUR RIGHTS: Law 101 for LGBTs (24 June 2005)• DYKE DIALOGUES 2: Lesbian Identities and Relationship Dynamics (October 2007) • RAINBOW EXCHANGE: M2M: Living the Gay Life ( November 2007)• DYKE DIALOGUES 3: The Sex Talk (January 26, 2008)• REVISITING THE PINK CARD (May 2008)
From June 26, 2008, with funding support from the Astraea Lesbian Foundation for Justice, R-Rights sponsored the following forums: • WOMAN NONETHELESS: Being a Trans Female in the Philippines (August 30, 2008)• DYKE DIALOGUES 4: SEXUAL NEGOTIATIONS An Intimate Forum on the Politics of the Artistic and Erotic (September 13, 2008)• TRANS DIALOGUE : TRANSGENDERISM 101 (November 22, 2008) • DYKE DIALOGUES 5: Out-ing the Queer Identity (February 7, 2009)• UNEQUAL UNDER THE LAW: Transgenderism in the Philippines (March 10, 2009)• GIVING VOICE TO THE PINK VOTE: Election and Party List Representation Law for LGBTs (March 21, 2009)• DYKE DIALOGUES 6: Families of the Heart – Legal Protections for Lesbian Partners and their Children (April 18, 2009)• DYKE DIALOGUES CEBU SERIES: An Exclusive Encounter with Rainbow Rights (May 1-2, 2009) • DYKE DIALOGUES CAGAYAN DE ORO: PLUS (People Like Us Meets Rainbow Rights) (May 23, 2009)• FILIPINO LGB YOUTH AND SUICIDE RISK: Findings from a National Survey (June 20, 2009)• LEGAL RIGHTS AND SEXUALITY (July 27, 2009)
Astraea’s support made it possible for R-Rights to have forums that generate awareness within the community, bring LGBT rights advocacy to mainstream discourses, and give recognition and appreciation to resource persons, a practice that expresses a high regard for activism work. It allowed R-Rights to go beyond Metro Manila. It also empowered R-Rights to sustain its “Pink Peso” campaign. In this campaign, R-Rights gives back to the community by availing the services of LGBT-run and-owned businesses and service providers.
It has also given R-Rights an opportunity to strengthen alliances with other advocacy groups and tap valuable resource persons from within and outside our community. Here is a list of the groups and individuals that R-Rights has worked with in the forums:• Baguio Pride Network• Cebupride • CDO People Like Us • Cordillera Women’s Education, Action and Research Center• Living the L Word (Manila)• Lunduyan ng Sining (Cradle of the Arts) • Metropolitan Community Church (Quezon City, Baguio City, and Makati City)• Paralegal Volunteers Organization, College of Law, University of the Philippines • Pi Sigma Delta Sorority (Baguio)• Radar Pridewear Inc. • Society of Transsexual Women of the Philippines (STRAP)• Task Force Pride • University of the Philippines Film Institute • University of the Philippines (Baguio) Student Council• UP Babaylan* And Ladlad LGBT Party
To all of you who have helped us and trusted us, to all of you who attended our forums and shared your insights and knowledge, to all of you who were generous with your time, talent, and services, to all of you who have stepped up to serve as facilitators and resource speakers, THANK YOU. This is not a “salamat, paalam.” We are not saying goodbye. R-Rights has more fun activities coming with its August 29, 2009 self-defense workshop for lesbians, and bisexual and transgender women co-sponsored by Radar Pridewear and Defense Specialists Inc, and its legal rights and sexuality forum on September 19, 2009, with Metropolitan Community Church (Quezon City).
Thank you and see you soon!
With love from R-RIGHTS
Its humble beginnings started with its “outing” on June 24, 2005 through a Round-Table Discussion on LGBT rights and Philippine Law at the University of the Philippines Center for Women Studies. After the discussion, R-Rights embarked on its Rainbow Exchange/Dyke Dialogue Series, with out-of-pocket funding and the kindness of friends.• DYKE DIALOGUES: OUR RIGHTS: Law 101 for LGBTs (24 June 2005)• DYKE DIALOGUES 2: Lesbian Identities and Relationship Dynamics (October 2007) • RAINBOW EXCHANGE: M2M: Living the Gay Life ( November 2007)• DYKE DIALOGUES 3: The Sex Talk (January 26, 2008)• REVISITING THE PINK CARD (May 2008)
From June 26, 2008, with funding support from the Astraea Lesbian Foundation for Justice, R-Rights sponsored the following forums: • WOMAN NONETHELESS: Being a Trans Female in the Philippines (August 30, 2008)• DYKE DIALOGUES 4: SEXUAL NEGOTIATIONS An Intimate Forum on the Politics of the Artistic and Erotic (September 13, 2008)• TRANS DIALOGUE : TRANSGENDERISM 101 (November 22, 2008) • DYKE DIALOGUES 5: Out-ing the Queer Identity (February 7, 2009)• UNEQUAL UNDER THE LAW: Transgenderism in the Philippines (March 10, 2009)• GIVING VOICE TO THE PINK VOTE: Election and Party List Representation Law for LGBTs (March 21, 2009)• DYKE DIALOGUES 6: Families of the Heart – Legal Protections for Lesbian Partners and their Children (April 18, 2009)• DYKE DIALOGUES CEBU SERIES: An Exclusive Encounter with Rainbow Rights (May 1-2, 2009) • DYKE DIALOGUES CAGAYAN DE ORO: PLUS (People Like Us Meets Rainbow Rights) (May 23, 2009)• FILIPINO LGB YOUTH AND SUICIDE RISK: Findings from a National Survey (June 20, 2009)• LEGAL RIGHTS AND SEXUALITY (July 27, 2009)
Astraea’s support made it possible for R-Rights to have forums that generate awareness within the community, bring LGBT rights advocacy to mainstream discourses, and give recognition and appreciation to resource persons, a practice that expresses a high regard for activism work. It allowed R-Rights to go beyond Metro Manila. It also empowered R-Rights to sustain its “Pink Peso” campaign. In this campaign, R-Rights gives back to the community by availing the services of LGBT-run and-owned businesses and service providers.
It has also given R-Rights an opportunity to strengthen alliances with other advocacy groups and tap valuable resource persons from within and outside our community. Here is a list of the groups and individuals that R-Rights has worked with in the forums:• Baguio Pride Network• Cebupride • CDO People Like Us • Cordillera Women’s Education, Action and Research Center• Living the L Word (Manila)• Lunduyan ng Sining (Cradle of the Arts) • Metropolitan Community Church (Quezon City, Baguio City, and Makati City)• Paralegal Volunteers Organization, College of Law, University of the Philippines • Pi Sigma Delta Sorority (Baguio)• Radar Pridewear Inc. • Society of Transsexual Women of the Philippines (STRAP)• Task Force Pride • University of the Philippines Film Institute • University of the Philippines (Baguio) Student Council• UP Babaylan* And Ladlad LGBT Party
To all of you who have helped us and trusted us, to all of you who attended our forums and shared your insights and knowledge, to all of you who were generous with your time, talent, and services, to all of you who have stepped up to serve as facilitators and resource speakers, THANK YOU. This is not a “salamat, paalam.” We are not saying goodbye. R-Rights has more fun activities coming with its August 29, 2009 self-defense workshop for lesbians, and bisexual and transgender women co-sponsored by Radar Pridewear and Defense Specialists Inc, and its legal rights and sexuality forum on September 19, 2009, with Metropolitan Community Church (Quezon City).
Thank you and see you soon!
With love from R-RIGHTS
Monday, August 24, 2009
Why I Am
Even at a young age, I knew I was different. The minute I started questioning the way my father was treating my older sisters compared to my brothers, I knew I was asking for trouble. But I just couldn’t understand why my eldest sister was forced to participate in beauty pageants while the next oldest was made to provide regular entertainment with her Tahitian-Hawaiian hula dance numbers. On the other hand, my eldest brother was displayed by my Dad as the NSDB scholar from UP, the big-shot fraternity man. Worse of was my second oldest brother who was gay. He was treated as the “black-sheep”; a deep dark secret, the butt-of-jokes during family reunions. It didn’t matter that he was also in UP and very artistic. I was upset by this arrangement and from then on, I knew I was going to test the gender-divides I grew up with.
Curiously, I reached menarche quite early. A real tomboy when I was growing up, I was grief-stricken when I started getting my boobs at nine. But I felt the heavens fell on me when I got my period at ten. I was completely distraught while my Mom was ecstatic. She thought maybe then I’d give up my Superman dolls, boxing gloves and water pistols. But toys and play was the least of my problems. I started having attractions for my female classmates. Sure I too had crushes on Gabby Concepcion and William Martinez, as well as Andrew McCarthy and Rob Lowe. But there was no neighborhood boy I particularly liked even if I got my share of ogles and stares as I rode my bike around in my skimpy shorts. Boys just did not appeal to me as did the girls in my class.
My puberty stage was pure agony. I was scared and confused because everyone was telling me it was wrong to like another girl. The nuns at school told me it was a sin I had to confess each week before I take Communion. Family and friends said it was “abnormal” and I was afraid they would not like me anymore. I blamed it on the environment of an All-girls Catholic school. I hoped that it was all a phase; that upon being exposed to boys soon, I would turn ”normal”.
So all throughout elementary and high school, I concealed hidden affections for numerous classmates. I wrote them love letters and poems for their crushes and boyfriends, and they commented at how well I could capture their feelings even if I hadn’t experienced it myself. In this aspect, writing “saved” me and gave me an outlet. The self-denial and self-hate which almost destroyed my soul, was salvaged by reading books and writing. Diary entries were replete with secret longings even as I continued to write poetry for my classmates’ public consumption. I even accommodated them by writing erotic fiction which they read aloud in the classroom during breaks.
For college, I chose to go to UP Los Banos because I wanted a co-ed university. I also wanted to break away from my sheltered childhood. For the first time in my life, I had to learn to ride public transport, budget my own money for food, make sure I get myself to class on time. I totally loved the independence and it was college life just like in the movies – dorm life, org and frat parties. So I was finally “exposed” to guys and actually enjoyed the company of my Upsilon fraternity brothers. Some Agribusiness classmates also went as far as courting me after seeing in skirts and dresses (this was all for my initiation in Sigma Delta Phi and UP Agribusiness Society, of course). Yet I still did not find that emotional connection with any males.
At UPLB, I was a member of the Sigma Delta Phi Sorority, the best known Greek-letter organization for women on campus. We were considered the best of the best, scholars, athletes, and artists. Recruitment is by invitation only; no walk-in applicants and you have to pass an intense screening. I was used to having females around me all the time, and I was comfortable with my social circle. But when I became an officer of the sorority, I felt obliged to act like a “real” lady. I had to conduct myself like a true Sigma Deltan and wear skirts or dresses for formal meetings, even bring a date to sorority balls. To be honest, it was so stifling.
After college, with my degree in business, I became a Makati girl and went to work in skirts and heels. I actually lost weight in that get-up and even sprained my ankle a few times with just inch-high heels. Strangely, through it all, friends in college and even at work knew I was really gay. That is not to say, I had quite a few “affairs” with other women then, but nothing was definite.
A year later I went to law school. The study of law was really intense and it ate up my whole life for the next couple of years. So I cannot say much about it except that I studied like hell and that’s where I met my Ex, the love of my life. She was a classmate, a case-pool groupmate, a sorority sister in the UP Law Portia Sorority. When I filed an LOA when my father died, she was the only one who visited me regularly. Since I almost lost my penchant for law when my Dad died (he was an attorney too), getting back into the groove was quite difficult. But Ex was there and after I finally came out to myself at the age of twenty-five, she was still there.
It was not easy for us. We talked about it a lot. We considered what our sorority sisters and classmates would say. We were rational about everything, until we finally decided we would be brave about what we had. People once asked me when we stopped being friends. I told them, we never stopped being friends. It’s just that there became an added dimension of being lovers as well. (For more detailed info on me and my Ex, please get hold of Unveilings, a woman’s writings anthology by my writer’s group, Women in Bliss.)
Coming out as a couple made us join the LGBT Community. With our legal education, we were especially useful to our fellow LGBTs. We were both intelligent and articulate, so we automatically became poster-kids for same-sex partners. We gave interviews, spoke on radio and TV, and continued to remain active in the local LGBT organizations and networks. It was through this LGBT groups where we also had our connection with womens NGOs and became familiar with womens issues as well.
To date, I am the Founding President of Rainbow Rights Project (R-Rights), Inc., the Corporate Secretary of Lesbian Advocates Phils, the former Policy Advocacy and Research Coordinator of LAGABLAB, a novice of Order of St. Aelred, a religious group for LGBTs, and currently the National Treasurer of Ang Ladlad, the first LGBT group seeking partylist.accreditation.
Meanwhile, believing that my legal training has been put to good use already, I decided to return to an old passion which was writing. I enrolled at the CAL Graduate School for an MA in English Studies Major in Creative Writing. Since I was already working as a government lawyer, I have not been able to concentrate too much on my Masters. But I go to school now because I enjoy it and I try to learn things that really interest me. Which brings me to Women’s Studies, which is not exactly new to me because of my regular work for the DSWD and my involvement with women’s NGOs. Like everything else that has interested me, I believe I will be able to use whatever I learn here in my everyday life.
Curiously, I reached menarche quite early. A real tomboy when I was growing up, I was grief-stricken when I started getting my boobs at nine. But I felt the heavens fell on me when I got my period at ten. I was completely distraught while my Mom was ecstatic. She thought maybe then I’d give up my Superman dolls, boxing gloves and water pistols. But toys and play was the least of my problems. I started having attractions for my female classmates. Sure I too had crushes on Gabby Concepcion and William Martinez, as well as Andrew McCarthy and Rob Lowe. But there was no neighborhood boy I particularly liked even if I got my share of ogles and stares as I rode my bike around in my skimpy shorts. Boys just did not appeal to me as did the girls in my class.
My puberty stage was pure agony. I was scared and confused because everyone was telling me it was wrong to like another girl. The nuns at school told me it was a sin I had to confess each week before I take Communion. Family and friends said it was “abnormal” and I was afraid they would not like me anymore. I blamed it on the environment of an All-girls Catholic school. I hoped that it was all a phase; that upon being exposed to boys soon, I would turn ”normal”.
So all throughout elementary and high school, I concealed hidden affections for numerous classmates. I wrote them love letters and poems for their crushes and boyfriends, and they commented at how well I could capture their feelings even if I hadn’t experienced it myself. In this aspect, writing “saved” me and gave me an outlet. The self-denial and self-hate which almost destroyed my soul, was salvaged by reading books and writing. Diary entries were replete with secret longings even as I continued to write poetry for my classmates’ public consumption. I even accommodated them by writing erotic fiction which they read aloud in the classroom during breaks.
For college, I chose to go to UP Los Banos because I wanted a co-ed university. I also wanted to break away from my sheltered childhood. For the first time in my life, I had to learn to ride public transport, budget my own money for food, make sure I get myself to class on time. I totally loved the independence and it was college life just like in the movies – dorm life, org and frat parties. So I was finally “exposed” to guys and actually enjoyed the company of my Upsilon fraternity brothers. Some Agribusiness classmates also went as far as courting me after seeing in skirts and dresses (this was all for my initiation in Sigma Delta Phi and UP Agribusiness Society, of course). Yet I still did not find that emotional connection with any males.
At UPLB, I was a member of the Sigma Delta Phi Sorority, the best known Greek-letter organization for women on campus. We were considered the best of the best, scholars, athletes, and artists. Recruitment is by invitation only; no walk-in applicants and you have to pass an intense screening. I was used to having females around me all the time, and I was comfortable with my social circle. But when I became an officer of the sorority, I felt obliged to act like a “real” lady. I had to conduct myself like a true Sigma Deltan and wear skirts or dresses for formal meetings, even bring a date to sorority balls. To be honest, it was so stifling.
After college, with my degree in business, I became a Makati girl and went to work in skirts and heels. I actually lost weight in that get-up and even sprained my ankle a few times with just inch-high heels. Strangely, through it all, friends in college and even at work knew I was really gay. That is not to say, I had quite a few “affairs” with other women then, but nothing was definite.
A year later I went to law school. The study of law was really intense and it ate up my whole life for the next couple of years. So I cannot say much about it except that I studied like hell and that’s where I met my Ex, the love of my life. She was a classmate, a case-pool groupmate, a sorority sister in the UP Law Portia Sorority. When I filed an LOA when my father died, she was the only one who visited me regularly. Since I almost lost my penchant for law when my Dad died (he was an attorney too), getting back into the groove was quite difficult. But Ex was there and after I finally came out to myself at the age of twenty-five, she was still there.
It was not easy for us. We talked about it a lot. We considered what our sorority sisters and classmates would say. We were rational about everything, until we finally decided we would be brave about what we had. People once asked me when we stopped being friends. I told them, we never stopped being friends. It’s just that there became an added dimension of being lovers as well. (For more detailed info on me and my Ex, please get hold of Unveilings, a woman’s writings anthology by my writer’s group, Women in Bliss.)
Coming out as a couple made us join the LGBT Community. With our legal education, we were especially useful to our fellow LGBTs. We were both intelligent and articulate, so we automatically became poster-kids for same-sex partners. We gave interviews, spoke on radio and TV, and continued to remain active in the local LGBT organizations and networks. It was through this LGBT groups where we also had our connection with womens NGOs and became familiar with womens issues as well.
To date, I am the Founding President of Rainbow Rights Project (R-Rights), Inc., the Corporate Secretary of Lesbian Advocates Phils, the former Policy Advocacy and Research Coordinator of LAGABLAB, a novice of Order of St. Aelred, a religious group for LGBTs, and currently the National Treasurer of Ang Ladlad, the first LGBT group seeking partylist.accreditation.
Meanwhile, believing that my legal training has been put to good use already, I decided to return to an old passion which was writing. I enrolled at the CAL Graduate School for an MA in English Studies Major in Creative Writing. Since I was already working as a government lawyer, I have not been able to concentrate too much on my Masters. But I go to school now because I enjoy it and I try to learn things that really interest me. Which brings me to Women’s Studies, which is not exactly new to me because of my regular work for the DSWD and my involvement with women’s NGOs. Like everything else that has interested me, I believe I will be able to use whatever I learn here in my everyday life.
How To Love her
When she walks away from you mad [ Follow her ] When she stares at your mouth [ Kiss her ] When she pushes you or hits you [ Grab her and dont let go ] When she starts cussing at you [ Kiss her and tell her you love her ] When she's quiet [ Ask her what's wrong ] When she ignores you [ Give her your attention ] When she pulls away [ Pull her back ] When you see her at her worst [ Tell her she's beautiful ] When you see her start crying [Just hold her and dont say a word ] When you see her walking [ Sneak up and hug her waist from behind ] When she's scared [ Protect her ] When she lays her head on your shoulder [ Tilt her head up and kiss her ] When she steals your favorite hat [ Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night] When she teases you [ Tease her back and make her laugh ] When she doesnt answer for a long time [ reassure her that everything is okay ] When she looks at you with doubt [ Back yourself up ] When she says that she likes you [ she really does more than you could understand ] When she grabs at your hands [ Hold hers and play with her fingers ] When she bumps into you [ bump into her back and make her laugh ] When she tells you a secret [ keep it safe and untold ] When she looks at you in your eyes [ dont look away until she does ] When she misses you [ she's hurting inside ] When you break her heart [ the pain never really goes away ] When she says it's over [ she still wants you to be hers ] When she reposts this bulletin [ she wants you to read it ] - Stay on the phone with her even if shes not saying anything. - When she's mad, hug her tight and don't let go - When she says she's ok dont believe it, talk with her - because 10 yrs later she'll remember you - Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her - Call her before you sleep and after you wake up - Treat her like she's all that matters to you. - Tease her and let her tease you back. - Stay up all night with her when she's sick. - Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid. - Give her the world. - Let her wear your clothes. - When she's bored and sad, hang out with her. - Let her know she's important. - Kiss her in the pouring rain. - When she runs up at you crying, the first thing you say is; "Who's ass am I kicking, babe?" If you do post this in the next four minutes the one you love will : •Call you. •Kiss you. •Love you. •Text you.
My List
THE LIST
This was inspired by Libay’s list of minimum requirements for a partner. But she warned me about copying, so I am making my own version. Instead of a list of what I want from a GF, I am going to make a list of what I can give my potential partner.
Appreciation – Remember Billy Joel’s song, “Tell Her about It”? That’s exactly what I mean. I won’t cringe from telling her everyday how much I love her. She will know what she really means to me and I will let her know how much I appreciate her. Too often we wait to long before we let our partners know that they are valued and loved. By the time we realize we have been neglecting our partner, she’s long gone. I may be the busiest GF one can possibly have, but my partner will never feel I am not there for her.
Communication – My partner can come to me to talk about anything. The same way that I will go to her and tell her everything going on in my life, I wouldn’t want her to leave anything out. My attraction starts with communication and my relationship should be sustained by communication. The moment this stops, I believe our most intimate connection with each other will be lost as well. I am a Gemini, I need to talk about things, articulate stuff to make it clear in my head.
Honesty – This leads us to honesty. I am a chronic confessor; I feel compelled to be open about my life to my partner. As I pointed out before, I’d rather know about the painful truth that be kept in the dark. Even if it’s about a 3rd party, falling out of love, wanting to end the relationship..I’d rather hear it straight from her.
Trust – Honesty begets trust. I know this is something that is earned, and once lost can be difficult to regain. I made the mistake of losing this once and I had a hard time trusting myself too for some time. But it’s part of my own naivete that I am still too trusting for my own good. I am willing to give this, but it’s also something I expect in return.
Respect – This also goes both ways for us. I will respect my partner’s personal integrity and individuality; I will not “cramp her style”. She can have her own plans and dreams, pursue her own activities even if they are not shared interests. But I would appreciate it very much if we both make an effort to try and do those things together if possible. My respect for her also borders on the utmost pride I feel for having her as my GF.
Courage – I surprise myself each time of what I am capable of when I really am in love. My GF couldn’t imagine what I would be willing to do and sacrifice for her. The sense of security being in-love gives me makes me braver than I give myself credit for sometimes. I realized, with a most uncertain thing such as love, we still manage to have faith that the person we fall for is worth it.
Loyalty and Commitment – I am capable of monogamy and fidelity; my ten-year track record can prove this. Nothing makes me happier than being in a loving, committed, passionate and monogamous relationship. I absolutely love the idea of being “married”. I am not just after a GF; I want a life partner, someone I can actually grow old with.
Genuine Affection – I am not particularly the PDA kind, but I am very sweet. My “language of love” is translated into various ways and means - from cheesy love letters and mushy to poetry, to morning cups of coffee or breakfast in bed, and foot massages after a tiring day. She will know this from the way I touch her, the way I hold her hand or put my arm around her shoulder.
Intense Lovemaking – Forgive me for being too traditional, but sex does have a special meaning for me. I don’t engage in it and not end up giving something of myself. For me, making love is an almost “spiritual” experience. When I make love, it is the most intimate connection I can have with another person. This is why I am always in danger of “falling” when I go to bed with someone. But I am a generous lover, my partner will not be left wanting or unsatisfied because I usually put her needs first before mine.
Friendship – As I said before, my greatest happiness is being married to my best friend. I want my life partner to be my friend as well. I also don’t think partners should stop being “friends” the moment they become “lovers”. As they say, when time has passed, and hot, passionate sex is gone, you can at least still stay together for the companionship.
These are lessons learned from my past relationships. I thank my Ex-partners for these lessons that I had to learn the hard way. But my new GF will probably thank you for it now.
This was inspired by Libay’s list of minimum requirements for a partner. But she warned me about copying, so I am making my own version. Instead of a list of what I want from a GF, I am going to make a list of what I can give my potential partner.
Appreciation – Remember Billy Joel’s song, “Tell Her about It”? That’s exactly what I mean. I won’t cringe from telling her everyday how much I love her. She will know what she really means to me and I will let her know how much I appreciate her. Too often we wait to long before we let our partners know that they are valued and loved. By the time we realize we have been neglecting our partner, she’s long gone. I may be the busiest GF one can possibly have, but my partner will never feel I am not there for her.
Communication – My partner can come to me to talk about anything. The same way that I will go to her and tell her everything going on in my life, I wouldn’t want her to leave anything out. My attraction starts with communication and my relationship should be sustained by communication. The moment this stops, I believe our most intimate connection with each other will be lost as well. I am a Gemini, I need to talk about things, articulate stuff to make it clear in my head.
Honesty – This leads us to honesty. I am a chronic confessor; I feel compelled to be open about my life to my partner. As I pointed out before, I’d rather know about the painful truth that be kept in the dark. Even if it’s about a 3rd party, falling out of love, wanting to end the relationship..I’d rather hear it straight from her.
Trust – Honesty begets trust. I know this is something that is earned, and once lost can be difficult to regain. I made the mistake of losing this once and I had a hard time trusting myself too for some time. But it’s part of my own naivete that I am still too trusting for my own good. I am willing to give this, but it’s also something I expect in return.
Respect – This also goes both ways for us. I will respect my partner’s personal integrity and individuality; I will not “cramp her style”. She can have her own plans and dreams, pursue her own activities even if they are not shared interests. But I would appreciate it very much if we both make an effort to try and do those things together if possible. My respect for her also borders on the utmost pride I feel for having her as my GF.
Courage – I surprise myself each time of what I am capable of when I really am in love. My GF couldn’t imagine what I would be willing to do and sacrifice for her. The sense of security being in-love gives me makes me braver than I give myself credit for sometimes. I realized, with a most uncertain thing such as love, we still manage to have faith that the person we fall for is worth it.
Loyalty and Commitment – I am capable of monogamy and fidelity; my ten-year track record can prove this. Nothing makes me happier than being in a loving, committed, passionate and monogamous relationship. I absolutely love the idea of being “married”. I am not just after a GF; I want a life partner, someone I can actually grow old with.
Genuine Affection – I am not particularly the PDA kind, but I am very sweet. My “language of love” is translated into various ways and means - from cheesy love letters and mushy to poetry, to morning cups of coffee or breakfast in bed, and foot massages after a tiring day. She will know this from the way I touch her, the way I hold her hand or put my arm around her shoulder.
Intense Lovemaking – Forgive me for being too traditional, but sex does have a special meaning for me. I don’t engage in it and not end up giving something of myself. For me, making love is an almost “spiritual” experience. When I make love, it is the most intimate connection I can have with another person. This is why I am always in danger of “falling” when I go to bed with someone. But I am a generous lover, my partner will not be left wanting or unsatisfied because I usually put her needs first before mine.
Friendship – As I said before, my greatest happiness is being married to my best friend. I want my life partner to be my friend as well. I also don’t think partners should stop being “friends” the moment they become “lovers”. As they say, when time has passed, and hot, passionate sex is gone, you can at least still stay together for the companionship.
These are lessons learned from my past relationships. I thank my Ex-partners for these lessons that I had to learn the hard way. But my new GF will probably thank you for it now.
All about Love
All About LOVE...
When u think of ur past love, u may view it as a failure. But when u find a new love, u view the past as a teacher. In the game of love, it doesnt really matter who won or who lost. What is important is u know when to hold on and when to let go! U know u really love someone when u want him or her to be happy even if his or her happiness means that u are not part of it. Everything happens for the best. If the person u love doesnt love u back, dont be afraid to love someone else again, for u will never know unless u give it a try. u will never love a person u love unless u risk for love. Love strikes in hurting. If u dont get hurt, u dont learn how to love. Love doesnt hurt all the time. Though the hurting is still there to test u, to help u grow. Dont find love, let love find u. That is why it is called falling in love because u dont force urself to fall. u just fall. U cannot finish a book without closing its chapters.If u want to go on, then u have to leave the past as u turn the pages. Love is not destroyed by a single failure or won by a single caress. It is a lifetime venture in which we are always learning, discovering and growing. The greatest irony of love is letting go when u need to hold on and holding on when u need to let go. We lose someone we love only when we are destined to find someone else who can love us even more than we can love ourselves. On falling out of love, take some time to heal and then get back on the horse. But dont ever make the same mistake of riding the same one that threw u the first time. To love is to risk rejection; to live is to risk dying, to hope is to risk failure. But risk must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is
When u think of ur past love, u may view it as a failure. But when u find a new love, u view the past as a teacher. In the game of love, it doesnt really matter who won or who lost. What is important is u know when to hold on and when to let go! U know u really love someone when u want him or her to be happy even if his or her happiness means that u are not part of it. Everything happens for the best. If the person u love doesnt love u back, dont be afraid to love someone else again, for u will never know unless u give it a try. u will never love a person u love unless u risk for love. Love strikes in hurting. If u dont get hurt, u dont learn how to love. Love doesnt hurt all the time. Though the hurting is still there to test u, to help u grow. Dont find love, let love find u. That is why it is called falling in love because u dont force urself to fall. u just fall. U cannot finish a book without closing its chapters.If u want to go on, then u have to leave the past as u turn the pages. Love is not destroyed by a single failure or won by a single caress. It is a lifetime venture in which we are always learning, discovering and growing. The greatest irony of love is letting go when u need to hold on and holding on when u need to let go. We lose someone we love only when we are destined to find someone else who can love us even more than we can love ourselves. On falling out of love, take some time to heal and then get back on the horse. But dont ever make the same mistake of riding the same one that threw u the first time. To love is to risk rejection; to live is to risk dying, to hope is to risk failure. But risk must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is
Friday, August 21, 2009
Ambassador's "tribute"
After keeping us hanging for so long, a representative from DFA finally speaks up..albeit vaguely.
Expressions of sympathy still do not answer the call for justice. But this is still better than making no concrete statements at all..are you hearing this DSWD bosses?
INQUIRER.net 8/17/09
KUALA LUMPUR, Malaysia—The Filipino nation is privileged to have witnessed the worldwide outpouring of admiration for the recently departed former President Corazon C. Aquino. Such a phenomenon, which couldn’t be anything but spontaneous, somehow helps to assuage our own grief over that grievous loss.
It also reminds us that the selflessness that is ordinarily attributed only to the likes of Rizal, Bonifacio, Mabini, et al occurred not only in the past but is very much still with us now—if we only looked hard enough through the opaque veil of self-doubt and cynicism. Tita Cory provided just one fine example.
For us here at the Philippine embassy in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia, we’ve had the added privilege of having worked with one other such hero, the late Social Welfare Attaché Finardo G. Cabilao.
Finard (as he asked to be called) was not, either in manner or speech, the swashbuckling type of hero at all; far from it.
Sitting next to him, you wouldn’t guess that upon those frail shoulders rested the fate—nay, the salvation—of many a Filipina victim of human trafficking here in Malaysia. For them, he helped arrange sanctuary from their tormentors; worked tirelessly on their legal problems, and helped to send them home upon resolution of their cases. Like the DSWD attachés who preceded him, he performed such deeds by the dozen; or even, it seemed at times, by the hundred. The record books of the Department of Social Welfare and Development Office in Zamboanga City, the usual re-entry point, should be filled with names of these Pinoy repatriate-refugees.
Finard was a familiar sight in Sarawak, in Sabah, and in the Federal Territory of Labuan nearby. After the huge fire that consumed an entire refugee village in Labuan, he was there with Consul General Renato Villa the very next day. He “worked the nightclub circuit” as an angel of mercy to those young women who, typically, were lured from otherwise honorable jobs back home with promises of the proverbial greener pastures abroad—but found themselves enmeshed in the flesh trade instead, with barely any hope for redemption. He wasn’t their customer; on the contrary, they were his “customers.” And, being customers, to him they were always right, never wrong.
As his co-worker who was responsible for him out here, I often had to restrain him from going too far in his advocacies or doing too much in his work for those distressed Filipinas. More than once, he pushed the envelope, risking his own safety or his status as a diplomat who was not expected to involve himself directly in domestic matters, though these may have been in joint pursuit of justice by local authorities. When reminded of this, he would invariably nod politely; but I was never really sure he shared my views on this.
Now he is gone—a very useful and productive life snuffed out in its prime—mere days short of his 50th birthday. We mourn his loss. Yet, as he himself would probably exhort us to, we must carry on with our work, looking after the well-being of Filipinos in Malaysia. There remains a steady stream of Finard’s erstwhile “customers.” And they are waiting for us who are still here to attend to them.
A little-known sidelight to the much-celebrated performances of the famed Bayanihan Dance Company in Kuala Lumpur last June is illustrative of his work ethic. Finard, who chaired the Committee on Food and Refreshments, went at it in such detail that the dancers never even came close to feeling thirsty, let alone getting hungry. He pre-arranged their meals and their baon during their bus rides. He went as far as to ensure a steady supply of bottled mineral water for the company members during rehearsals and performances—backstage, in the dressing rooms and, yes, on their bus.
In the end, Finard didn’t even get to sit down and enjoy the Bayanihan’s much-acclaimed Gala Performance that night of June 15th. When he was satisfied that all the members’ nutritional needs had been met, he quietly took a taxicab for the airport to catch a late-night flight to Sarawak state across the South China Sea—in order to assist yet another group of Filipinas in need.
That not-so-little act of self-denial was not unusual; it was classic Finardo Cabilao.So, there goes a true Filipino hero for these times.
The good news for our people is that there are still many civil servants like Finardo Cabilao around us, if we only looked hard enough. They need all the moral support and understanding from the Filipino public that they serve.
Meanwhile, paalam, Kasamang Finard
Expressions of sympathy still do not answer the call for justice. But this is still better than making no concrete statements at all..are you hearing this DSWD bosses?
INQUIRER.net 8/17/09
KUALA LUMPUR, Malaysia—The Filipino nation is privileged to have witnessed the worldwide outpouring of admiration for the recently departed former President Corazon C. Aquino. Such a phenomenon, which couldn’t be anything but spontaneous, somehow helps to assuage our own grief over that grievous loss.
It also reminds us that the selflessness that is ordinarily attributed only to the likes of Rizal, Bonifacio, Mabini, et al occurred not only in the past but is very much still with us now—if we only looked hard enough through the opaque veil of self-doubt and cynicism. Tita Cory provided just one fine example.
For us here at the Philippine embassy in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia, we’ve had the added privilege of having worked with one other such hero, the late Social Welfare Attaché Finardo G. Cabilao.
Finard (as he asked to be called) was not, either in manner or speech, the swashbuckling type of hero at all; far from it.
Sitting next to him, you wouldn’t guess that upon those frail shoulders rested the fate—nay, the salvation—of many a Filipina victim of human trafficking here in Malaysia. For them, he helped arrange sanctuary from their tormentors; worked tirelessly on their legal problems, and helped to send them home upon resolution of their cases. Like the DSWD attachés who preceded him, he performed such deeds by the dozen; or even, it seemed at times, by the hundred. The record books of the Department of Social Welfare and Development Office in Zamboanga City, the usual re-entry point, should be filled with names of these Pinoy repatriate-refugees.
Finard was a familiar sight in Sarawak, in Sabah, and in the Federal Territory of Labuan nearby. After the huge fire that consumed an entire refugee village in Labuan, he was there with Consul General Renato Villa the very next day. He “worked the nightclub circuit” as an angel of mercy to those young women who, typically, were lured from otherwise honorable jobs back home with promises of the proverbial greener pastures abroad—but found themselves enmeshed in the flesh trade instead, with barely any hope for redemption. He wasn’t their customer; on the contrary, they were his “customers.” And, being customers, to him they were always right, never wrong.
As his co-worker who was responsible for him out here, I often had to restrain him from going too far in his advocacies or doing too much in his work for those distressed Filipinas. More than once, he pushed the envelope, risking his own safety or his status as a diplomat who was not expected to involve himself directly in domestic matters, though these may have been in joint pursuit of justice by local authorities. When reminded of this, he would invariably nod politely; but I was never really sure he shared my views on this.
Now he is gone—a very useful and productive life snuffed out in its prime—mere days short of his 50th birthday. We mourn his loss. Yet, as he himself would probably exhort us to, we must carry on with our work, looking after the well-being of Filipinos in Malaysia. There remains a steady stream of Finard’s erstwhile “customers.” And they are waiting for us who are still here to attend to them.
A little-known sidelight to the much-celebrated performances of the famed Bayanihan Dance Company in Kuala Lumpur last June is illustrative of his work ethic. Finard, who chaired the Committee on Food and Refreshments, went at it in such detail that the dancers never even came close to feeling thirsty, let alone getting hungry. He pre-arranged their meals and their baon during their bus rides. He went as far as to ensure a steady supply of bottled mineral water for the company members during rehearsals and performances—backstage, in the dressing rooms and, yes, on their bus.
In the end, Finard didn’t even get to sit down and enjoy the Bayanihan’s much-acclaimed Gala Performance that night of June 15th. When he was satisfied that all the members’ nutritional needs had been met, he quietly took a taxicab for the airport to catch a late-night flight to Sarawak state across the South China Sea—in order to assist yet another group of Filipinas in need.
That not-so-little act of self-denial was not unusual; it was classic Finardo Cabilao.So, there goes a true Filipino hero for these times.
The good news for our people is that there are still many civil servants like Finardo Cabilao around us, if we only looked hard enough. They need all the moral support and understanding from the Filipino public that they serve.
Meanwhile, paalam, Kasamang Finard
Human Trafficking in Asia
Dear friends,I would just like to share some information on the state of human trafficking in the region. Our social welfare attache in malaysia was brutally murdered last week. He is known among womens NGOs and migrant networks as an effective public servant who was instrumental in repatriating numerous Filipina victims of human trafficking. He was working on a several trafficking cases and was due to appear in court when he was killed. He even waived his diplomatic immunity since he was the only witness left against a big international trafficking syndicate. What is appalling is the impunity with which criminals simply do away with government employees who actually do their job and protect their fellow Filipinos, and the seeming apathy government officials regard their deaths.A STATEMENT ON THE DEATH OF A FELLOW PUBLIC SERVANTWe, the Social Welfare Employees Association of the Philippines (SWEAP), representing member rank and file employees of the Department of Social Welfare and Development (DSWD) nationwide, wish to express our deep shock, sorrow and condemnation over the violent killing of a fellow public servant, former DSWD Director Finardo G. Cabilao, social welfare attaché at the Philippine embassy in Kuala Lumpur.We extend our sincerest and most heartfelt condolences and sympathy to his wife, and his family; Director Cabilao has shown what it really means to serve the Filipino people. We salute him as another public servant hero and inspiration particularly for the social welfare and development sector.Before he died, Director Cabilao has been receiving death threats as he struggled to protect our countrymen/women against sex trafficking. He even went to the extent of giving up his diplomatic immunity to testify in a Malaysian court just to do so. We believe he was murdered because of this.We therefore call on our government, particularly our DSWD Secretary Esperanza I. Cabral and former DSWD Secretary and now President Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo, to take urgent and concrete steps to secure justice for Director Cabilao and his bereaved family.We also take this occasion to call for measures that would give greater security and protection to public servants here and abroad, particularly for social welfare and development workers who are exposed to various hazards and dangers because of the nature of their work.Together with fellow public servants and social welfare development workers, we cry:JUSTICE FOR CABILAO, JUSTICE FOR ALL PUBLIC SERVANTS!
Monday, August 10, 2009
Ladlad and Me
I thought I was the last to know about that article in the Philippine Daily Inquirer featuring my interview about Ladlad. Besides Libay and Bemz who posted it in multiply and facebook, respectively, a male friend from a regional human rights training institute posted it in our egroups as well. I was a little surprised, but was genuinely pleased to have done my bit for Ladlad in Baguio, even after all the politicking involved. After a week or so, my Mom confronted me about it last weekend. Apparently, one morning, a churchmate asked her if she had a child by my name. She said yes, that's my lawyer daughter..and this co-parishioner then preceeded to tell her about the "gays in congress" newsbit. She rushed home and asked the maids to look for the Monday issue of PDI. I am not sure how she reacted in front of her fellow parishioner, whether she was embarrassed or proud. But she cut out the news article and set it aside to show me when I visited.I guess my own family did not realize the extent of my LGBT advocacy work until now. They have known me to be a member of numerous organizations even while in college. But they never knew exactly what I do and who I really am among my peers and colleagues in the LGBT Community. That was until my own niece who is studying in Australia spoke of a fellow Filipino graduate student who allegedly knew me. She was speaking of Patrick of Ladlad and who hails from faraway Cebu. My niece told her Mom and the next day my older sister asked me if I was indeed Ladlad's national treasurer. Oh well...There is still much work to be done for Ladlad and my family might get the occasional surprise again soon. And wait till we get to Congress...heheheh :)
Baguio Interview
Gays trying harder to make it to Congress
By Desiree Caluza Inquirer Northern Luzon First Posted 02:52:00 06/29/2009
BAGUIO CITY—The group Ang Ladlad said Sunday it was working to remove the obstacles to its party-list accreditation so that Filipino gays and lesbians could win representation in Congress in next year’s polls. Lawyer Germaine Leonin, Ang Ladlad treasurer, said the Commission on Elections disqualified the group in 2007 on the grounds that it failed to prove it had a nationwide membership. “This year, we are doing the groundwork [to satisfy the] regional representation requirement. So we have been going [around the] provinces to enlist support from gay and lesbian groups,” said Leonin, who attended the Gay Pride march here on Sunday. She said Ang Ladlad members visited Cebu City, Cagayan de Oro City, General Santos City, Aklan and Zambales recently to organize chapters and strengthen their campaign for party-list accreditation. She said the group would submit to the Comelec documents and other materials to prove they have members in provinces all over the country. “(The Comelec) said we are not representing a marginalized sector. But we are representing 10 percent of the population,” Leonin said. The Comelec had rejected the group’s application for accreditation, saying that “reports from our field offices reveal that it doesn’t exist in most regions of the country.” Leonin said Ang Ladlad will push the Anti-Discrimination Bill that gives lesbians, gays, bisexuals and transgenders (LGBT) equal rights and opportunities in employment as well as in schools, restaurants, hotels, entertainment centers and government offices. On Sunday, about 100 gays and lesbians marched down Session Road in this mountain city wearing costumes and carrying placards denouncing discrimination and homophobia. The march was organized by the Baguio Pride Network as part of international gay pride celebrations that commemorated the 1969 Stonewall riots in New York City. The riots were triggered by a police raid on a New York bar frequented by gays and lesbians.
By Desiree Caluza Inquirer Northern Luzon First Posted 02:52:00 06/29/2009
BAGUIO CITY—The group Ang Ladlad said Sunday it was working to remove the obstacles to its party-list accreditation so that Filipino gays and lesbians could win representation in Congress in next year’s polls. Lawyer Germaine Leonin, Ang Ladlad treasurer, said the Commission on Elections disqualified the group in 2007 on the grounds that it failed to prove it had a nationwide membership. “This year, we are doing the groundwork [to satisfy the] regional representation requirement. So we have been going [around the] provinces to enlist support from gay and lesbian groups,” said Leonin, who attended the Gay Pride march here on Sunday. She said Ang Ladlad members visited Cebu City, Cagayan de Oro City, General Santos City, Aklan and Zambales recently to organize chapters and strengthen their campaign for party-list accreditation. She said the group would submit to the Comelec documents and other materials to prove they have members in provinces all over the country. “(The Comelec) said we are not representing a marginalized sector. But we are representing 10 percent of the population,” Leonin said. The Comelec had rejected the group’s application for accreditation, saying that “reports from our field offices reveal that it doesn’t exist in most regions of the country.” Leonin said Ang Ladlad will push the Anti-Discrimination Bill that gives lesbians, gays, bisexuals and transgenders (LGBT) equal rights and opportunities in employment as well as in schools, restaurants, hotels, entertainment centers and government offices. On Sunday, about 100 gays and lesbians marched down Session Road in this mountain city wearing costumes and carrying placards denouncing discrimination and homophobia. The march was organized by the Baguio Pride Network as part of international gay pride celebrations that commemorated the 1969 Stonewall riots in New York City. The riots were triggered by a police raid on a New York bar frequented by gays and lesbians.
R-Rights in the Beginning
With the various activities R-Rights held in the last few months, we have somehow gathered a loyal following who often wondered about our beginnings. Here's sharing the vision behind Rainbow Rights Project.
"Rainbow Rights Project proposes to be an innovation to Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgendered (LGBT) advocacy in the Philippines. Instead of the usual “reactionary” nature of direct activism, R-Rights will be more “thoughtful” and will seek to be a purely intellectual endeavour. It will be geared towards knowledge production, separate from the political base of advocacy groups, and will be focused at developing ideas that will create major changes in the long run. While the Philippine LGBT Community has already succeeded in organizing the troops and galvanizing support from local LGBT members, increased visibility did not necessarily promote a singular, unified “voice” on certain matters. As such, in the midst of all the organizing, the “brains” of the movement, a long-term approach that focused on pure study was always lacking. There is a genuine, felt need for rigorous, analytical investigations of issues and an institution that will come up with quality research and unbiased reports on LGBT concerns. The idea is to come up with an academic “think tank”, a legal resource center dedicated to sexual orientation law and public policy. The vision will continue to be about eliminating discrimination and violence against LGBT members, but will utilize policy research and development, as well as legal reform, as concrete strategies to promote LGBT rights. The goal is to make daily conversations, or debates if you will, less shrill with high emotion and dramatic fervor, and instead be rational, objective, and more importantly, informed discussions on LGBT rights. It will aim to “internally” educate the ranks of the LGBT Community and to consolidate arguments and positions on different LGBT matters. As of now, no LGBT group or network has successfully organized a law-based project such as this. Similarly, no alternative lawyering NGO has established a legal resource institution devoted to this form of developmental law. Sexual Orientation law is virtually unheard of in the Philippine legal community and remains to be a vague concept among LGBT members. As such, there is clearly an unexplored territory which should be exploited to advance LGBT rights in the Philippines. For LGBT members or LGBT-friendly individuals with the proper legal training, this is also an opportunity to engage in meaningful and fulfilling legal work that will surely benefit the Filipino LGBT community."
(from the Concept Paper by Germaine in 2005)
"Rainbow Rights Project proposes to be an innovation to Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgendered (LGBT) advocacy in the Philippines. Instead of the usual “reactionary” nature of direct activism, R-Rights will be more “thoughtful” and will seek to be a purely intellectual endeavour. It will be geared towards knowledge production, separate from the political base of advocacy groups, and will be focused at developing ideas that will create major changes in the long run. While the Philippine LGBT Community has already succeeded in organizing the troops and galvanizing support from local LGBT members, increased visibility did not necessarily promote a singular, unified “voice” on certain matters. As such, in the midst of all the organizing, the “brains” of the movement, a long-term approach that focused on pure study was always lacking. There is a genuine, felt need for rigorous, analytical investigations of issues and an institution that will come up with quality research and unbiased reports on LGBT concerns. The idea is to come up with an academic “think tank”, a legal resource center dedicated to sexual orientation law and public policy. The vision will continue to be about eliminating discrimination and violence against LGBT members, but will utilize policy research and development, as well as legal reform, as concrete strategies to promote LGBT rights. The goal is to make daily conversations, or debates if you will, less shrill with high emotion and dramatic fervor, and instead be rational, objective, and more importantly, informed discussions on LGBT rights. It will aim to “internally” educate the ranks of the LGBT Community and to consolidate arguments and positions on different LGBT matters. As of now, no LGBT group or network has successfully organized a law-based project such as this. Similarly, no alternative lawyering NGO has established a legal resource institution devoted to this form of developmental law. Sexual Orientation law is virtually unheard of in the Philippine legal community and remains to be a vague concept among LGBT members. As such, there is clearly an unexplored territory which should be exploited to advance LGBT rights in the Philippines. For LGBT members or LGBT-friendly individuals with the proper legal training, this is also an opportunity to engage in meaningful and fulfilling legal work that will surely benefit the Filipino LGBT community."
(from the Concept Paper by Germaine in 2005)
Thursday, July 30, 2009
Passing Up
I passed up a chance last weekend and i learned something about myself. one of my clinically-heartbroken buddies was on self-destruct mode and wanted a co-conspirator. I thought i could be a willing collaborator..victim and user in one. but i turned chronic-confessor and was again "too honest for my own good." this made her feel guilty about using me and losing the friendship in the end..suffice it to say, we didnt go through with it. this damn "personal value system" always has consequences...what does it say about me..-3/5/07
Serendipitous Changes
I've been going through many changes lately. it's my way of coping, surviving..but funny things are happening. After being required to take a "penalty" for not finishing my MA thesis on time, i am taking up a Women and Development course i am thoroughly enjoying and finding quite useful. What more, i've become something like a "star pupil" to my gorgeous teacher that i just don't wanna miss any Sat class. I've also been compelled to leave my "prestigious" Legal Officer position to become an ordinary Planning Officer at our agency. Apparently, my work doing policy/position papers, commenting on proposed social welfare legislation, and directly dealing w/ clientele like the elderly, children and women are much more relevant to the Department than any administrative disciplinary case i prosecuted against a co-employee. What more it's just been a week and I'm alrdy functioning as an OIC at my new ofc. I now have access to scholarships and trainings abroad too. A Chinese saying goes: "When the wind blows, be like the leaf and go with it; who knows you might find yourself in a much better place when you wake up." Maybe I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be now...-2/24/07
New Friends, Good Friends
hyperReiz, wildflowerMaria, customsCarmen, revieweeTina, partygoerCool, brotherMike, StaRosaRex, PasigIvy, QuirinoLenskie, SampalocMoppet, PrincessRatna, CaregiverMelds, AileenBicol, UPgrad, LaPinasMom, ParanaqueNurse, BicolanaCESO, CounselorfrRizal, NGOatty, HRworker, gorgeousProf...healers and confidantes all. we say "hello" when we say "goodbye"..we don't know who will eventually stay. So goes the merry-go-round, people get on, then people get off...-2/24/07
Deciding to be Happy
My sisters say I'm already happy. But according to them, I just get reminded sometimes that i should be sad, so turn sullen all of a sudden. My friends say I look happy too. Thay say I just refuse to believe it and i keep insisting i should be unhappy still. They say all in due time, but it's still ultimately my choice, my decision, when to say enough is enough and just get back on the saddle agn. But i like my pain, its a comfort zone of sorts. Being with someone right now can't give me that sense of refuge and security. I just give in..for their sake, coz at least one of us is happy and in love, right? -2/22/07
Ending It
i wonder what it's like to be the one to say goodbye. what exactly do you have to say to send a clear message? as james ingram said, "there's no easy way to break somebody's heart.." jimmy bondoc likewise said, "let me be the one...so you don't have to make excuses." i wonder what it feels like to watch her cry as you deliver your " it's not you, it's me.." speech. sure i am happy for now..but not knowing WHEN it will end (which i'm sure it will anyway) is killing me! just want to be the one to say goodbye this time...that way i decide when i'm ready. -2/21/07
Restless and Tired
i'm restless agn. maybe i need another trip. doesnt have to be out of the country. i'd settle for anywhere around the Phils. just need a change of scenery. the influx of new people in my life has been constant. they are smart young women..in need of good conversation, some LGBT education. bt what makes me bored all of a sudden. maybe i'm just tired. simply tired of trying so hard to make myself happy..tired of chasing too many things..tired of doing what is expected of a mature person..when i just wanna be childish, self-centered, and insensitive. -2/21/07
Love Has A Warranty
if she tells you she loves you, should you readily believe it? i can't help thinking at the back of my mind, "yeah sure,..and then later on, you will just change your mind about me again.." in love as in everything in life, there are no guarantees..people change, shit happens, couples break up. so you ask yourself what's the point?
when she tells you she loves you, is it an assurance that she won't ever hurt you? of course not, but you should only have to ask yourself if you'd let yourself be stupid enough to let it happen again.
so when she tells you she loves you and that you make her very happy, just smile back. just be ready with an answer if she asks you if you do love her back too...2/19/07
Accidental Counselor
on my way to recovery, something funny happened to me along the way..i've become an accidental counselor to others going through heartbreak. I have become a caregiver to my fellow walking wounded. How can i tell them I am still undergoing the process of healing. For some selfish reasons, i considered "dating" more fun than counseling. so that was my personal therapy. i cannot tell them when the hurting will stop because i still have bad days myself, when i have nightmares or when i wake up feeling a heaviness i can't shake off. i cannot tell them why their relationships ended because i still can't understand what went wrong with mine. so i mouth off to them the same things i keep telling myself - that i deserve to be loved for myself and that i can be happy again. but don't ever ask me what that really means... 2/19/07
Closure
They promised me it would be my "closure". But things are just that...things, objects...stuff you don't really care about having or taking in the first place. They promised me having my own place, my own space would give me back my sense of self. But waking up in this room only reminds me that this isn't really where i want to be. I do not want to seem ungrateful or unappreciative for what i have. Yet sometimes, there is nothing like knowing what you have to be certain of what you really want. 2/12/07
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